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Have you been accused of being gay?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by mes1995, Jul 10, 2012.

  1. Brenny

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    In high school I had no idea that I was gay and I just never expressed myself. I got bullied by a couple guys that called me "Beautiful." That was the closest thing to being suspected or called out on it. A few years later, I concluded I'm gay and ever since people have commented on my sexuality or joked or asked about it regularly.

    My previous boss hired me and told my coworker at the time (who was gay) that he found him "a new friend."

    At my current work we have been sampling a new drink. I was telling some customers that it tasted like a platinum margarita (without the alcohol). The girls were all mocking me and like "Ohhhh we know Bren likes the margaritas!" And I was like, "Nooo I just hate the taste of alcohol so it has to be sugary." The other girl laughed and said how I "like it fruity" and that I was much more fun than another coworker. Then the subject turned to how I look like I should just work for J. Crew, or Hollister. Me being stupid just said, "I don't even know what J. Crew is!" Lie....

    Add to that a year ago when my whole family at home kept talking behind my back how they suspect I'm gay. They ended up deciding I am not. Well after fighting with my mother for months over various things (this being part of it) I just decided to end it, say I'm not and move on with life and have some peace. As far as family relations go, it worked.
     
    #41 Brenny, Jul 10, 2012
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2012
  2. SimplyJay

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    A few years ago my brother asked me "are you a (3-letter word beginning with 'F')" .. my answer was a quick "no"

    --

    I think my sister might suspect it but has never said anything.

    --

    A good number of years ago a coworker tried to indirectly ask me through a few questions about girls and such. I did admit to never having had a girlfriend, but I knew what he was getting at so part of one of my answers was something to the effect of "don't even start with the 'g' word around me" (and said it in a sorta not nice voice..but I also wasn't in a good mood). After that he never questioned anything further.

    At some later date I sorta overheard him talking to a girl and he said he was (I don't remember the number now, but something that amounted to bi) on the Kinsey scale. Soon after that he moved - for college/better job reasons.

    Never thought anything of it at the time, but in later years I really did wonder if he was maybe interested...
    (I also kinda remember him being quiet/maybe a bit shocked/hurt? after I said my comment about the 'g' word ...maybe I was a bit too mean. idk)
     
  3. BajanBoy13

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    Two of my friends asked but I totally freaked out and denied it :s
     
  4. DrummerGirl

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    Some of my friends at school called me a "lesbo whore" when they're joking around with me and I always made gay jokes at my own expense, so I'm sure people had their suspicions. An ex boyfriend asked me if I'm gay (that was an awkward conversation), but besides that no one has asked me directly. Some guy I didn't really know asked one of my friends and some of my friends that I've come out to said they already thought that I'm a lesbian.
     
  5. anonymous1

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    My aunt asked me. We were on a little weekend trip and I brought a friend (bi). My aunt asked if either of us were gay. We both denied it because my friend wasn't out to me and I wasn't out to anyone. I think she has such good gaydar because she's a teacher and works with kids.

    One of my friends asked me directly, I said yes.
    Another friend suspected
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    another friend suspected
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    pretty much everyone has guessed. I'm not that obvious! I just haven't shown an interest in boys :dry: Sigh I'm too gay.
     
  6. ArtSaves

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    I've only come out to some of my friends and most of them were surprised and during high school no one really accused me of being gay or bi. Only one of my friends, when I told her I was bi, she laughed and said "I already knew"

    Well, and I dont know if this counts.... I haven't come out to my sister or to my brother-in-law. They live in another country, so one day my brother-in-law said that if I ever wanted to go there on my own they would be more than happy to receive me and he said "if you want you can come with a boyfriend or a girlfriend". I don't know if he was just joking or if he was being serious.... I think I'll know when I finally come out to them, but I think they suspect I'm not straight
     
  7. CelticRae

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    Heheh My brother guessed I was gay when I was 16. lol Now he was only 14 at the time. Of course I denied it than but it was only a matter of time. Kids got impeccable gaydar.
     
  8. SkyDiver

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    Yeah... it kinda sucked because at that point I was still trying so hard to appear straight.

    Some guy 2 grades above me asked me if I liked boys.. so I said "no...", and he's like "Are you sure?" and the way he said it was just really demeaning and insulting. I could tell he was trying to hurt me. This was also around my friends.

    (By the way, that was years ago. I still hear about him and last I've heard he hasn't done much with his life....)
     
  9. Night Rain

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    Poor guy. :confused:

    I've been suspected by everyone (minus family) but they're all too nice to confront me. :slight_smile: Some even joke about me being a girl. It's funny.
     
  10. Deaf Not Blind

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    yes, i have been asked cuz I wear mens boots, or because i belch, or because i cross my legs like a guy, or because i am not acting affectionate...huggy. also i had told a best friend when i was a preteen that i was a boy, so she grew up and asked me when i saw her again if i was gay.

    not one person had ever told me i was transgender, just gay or tomboy.
     
    #50 Deaf Not Blind, Jul 11, 2012
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2012
  11. Tim

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    Yes, in High School, one girl asked me, I said no, as I was deathly afraid of my mom finding out, even though I swore I'd never deny it if someone asked.

    I actually got really weird about it, found her on facebook a few years later and apologized for lying, lol.
     
  12. Deaf Not Blind

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    like the poster above, today i was online with a nice pro-ASL hearing woman, a Christian, and I was always afraid of her knowing what i am cuz i wanted to keep her respect as she is going to publish my work.

    i felt a need to come out today though. don't know why. she always irritated me by ending every sentence with GIRL. it was like a knife. so maybe that was why! i had told her i was meeting my roomy at the mall, and she said you didn't invite me shopping. i said i had new clothes already cuz i lost weight, and she said we could go get similar stuff and i said she would not want mine, i buy menswear.

    then she asked could she maybe ask a personal question. :slight_smile: i hoped it would be it. i said anything. she said politely am i a lesbian. i said, i am not. i am transgender! :grin:

    she didn't really grasp it, nobody ever does. but i even told her my name, and that it had hurt saying girl to me.

    so she now jokingly ends each sentence BOY! hahaha! yeah, capitals. but then she also added she had been married divorced and dated 3 years a woman who was a butch dyke, before being married again. she then wanted to know if she is my type! :grin: i told her, nope, sorry, this gentleman prefers blonds!

    how cool is someone guessing you are gay, and not going to do anything with it, but not only accepts you wants to know if you find them attractive! i didn't lose a friend's respect, i just got accepted for who i really am.
     
  13. Toony

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    Well, it was started by my dad saying something horrifically homophobic. My mom responded by asking, "What if ____ was gay, you'd still love her, right...?"

    After, some bickering between the two of them, and my mom saying that she'd love me even though she'd disapprove...he finally said that he would, but any girl that I liked wouldn't be allowed anywhere remotely near the property.
    But my mom had to push him pretty hard to get him to say that he'd still love me.

    And I'm not at all out, since I have no idea what to come out as.(Despite everything, I've only recently started to seriously consider that there was a possibility that I wasn't just extremely picky, a very late bloomer, asexual, etc, etc.)

    And the thought of telling anyone, let alone my parents, that I'm questioning just makes me terribly uneasy.
     
    #53 Toony, Jul 11, 2012
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2012
  14. King

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    Oh god, I haven't been asked if I was gay in such a long time. But yes, I have been accused. I was usually asked "if he says yes he's gay" questions, such as "Do you drink Vex?" and "Do you like Lady Gaga?" and "Do you like romance movies?"
    I usually laughed and never answered the questions directly, instead making them feel stupid for trying to get me to "admit" to being gay.

    King x
     
  15. Sayu

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    Yes, I have been accused and not once. Actually it doesn't even bother me - at least I know it won't be such a surprise for people when I come out :icon_wink
     
  16. awesomeyodais

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    In retrospect it wasn't done in a accusatory tone, but I sure reacted that way, and far from gracefully. It was a long time ago, I was far from ready to understand, accept it let alone admit it. He was a somewhat close friend, things were great when he was "between girlfriends" (the term bromance didn't exist back then but would have been fitting), but he transformed into a bit of a jerk when he was seeing a girl. I still don't know if I was over-reacting to his personality swings, or if it was jealousy. He may have been bi or curious and hiding it too. Probably a messy mix of "all of the above".
     
  17. sugarcubeigloo

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    I recently had someone ask me if I was gay at a party in front of people, but that's as far as accusations have gone. Although, whenever I come out to people, I always ask if they are surprised. A quick little poll I guess. :lol: Its always a resounding no. It surprises me every time they say no, you think I would start to expect it. *shrugs* I guess I don't hide it as well as I thought I did.
     
  18. Black Cat

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    I've only been accused of being gay twice in my entire life, at least to my face that is.

    The first time was in first grade. Some girl called me gay on the bus. I don't even remember why. She was a bully anyway. I came home crying, not even knowing what gay was yet. My mom got her suspended. I wasn't the only kid that girl picked on though, so it was cool to have her leave everybody alone after picking on me. In retrospect I don't know if this one officially counts, but whatever.

    The other time I was 19. My step-father accused me of being gay because I'm not bringing girls home every night and shooting them into space from my mattress like he was at my age. That's why he had a kid at 18 before he was even willing to sleep with the same girl twice, much less marry one and support her. I had a damn hard time not laughing in his face at that one, since I was already here on EC and starting my coming out process.

    I'm sure there have been numerous other times that I wasn't around for. I've also been asked on the odd occasion, but I've only really been accused just those two times.
     
  19. alex1170

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    I have been accused once and only once by a girl that I know pretty well. I think she was half joking when she said it. It happened like this. She kept asking my why I don't have a girlfriend and why girl x and girl y were not on my radar. She had a boyfriend at the time so she was asking purely out of interest I assume. I told her it was because I don't have enough time for a girlfriend (which was probably true at the time in all honesty). I am not sure if she bought it though. She may be the only one who has figured it out in her head. I love playing and watching sports, I have a crazy low and deep voice and I don't fall into any of the stereotypes. So it is not most peoples first instincts. But I am objectively pretty attractive (my boyfriend makes fun of me when I say this, he thinks I am being modest), so it may be a bit suspicious that I have never had a girlfriend. That is why I tell my high school friends I have had one at college and my college friends I had a couple in high school.
     
  20. Ally

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    i recently told one of my closest friends, who i have known since i was 15 years old, that i think im bisexual.

    he then told me he thought i was a lesbian for an entire year when we first met in high school.
    figures. :slight_smile:

    another time, when i was in my early 20's, a female friend came to the bank with me to switch an account, and the teller asked if we were there to open a joint checking account.
    we figured she assumed we were a couple, but it wasn't offensive.
    it was actually very comforting to have met a random person who was so unfazed by the prospect of two women she didn't know being in love with each other.