Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by sugarcubeigloo, May 25, 2013.
sometimes but like everyone I have specific things about myself that I despise.
I used to be in a vicious circle of thinking I was unattractive and then following the extreme nonconformist path of actually not trying to be attractive (i.e. wearing popular clothes, hair styles, or being an athlete). It was only natural for me because I had always been underweight, something which my dad irritatingly would point out to me (even though he was skinny at my age and eventually got fat!).
Maybe part of me was happy playing the part of "the nice guy who never gets the girls" (not that I wanted them in the first place!). I had this idea that I wanted people to be friends with me for my mind/personality, not looks. Ironically the only time I didn't mind looking good was dressing up for church, where I would always wear a nice dress shirt, shoes, and pants (or a suit for special days).
Only in the past few years have I started realizing I shouldn't be afraid of dressing well, especially since I am inching closer out of the closet and don't want to look sloppy. I also slowly developed muscles from practicing archery every day (but now my biceps are uneven since I pull with the right arm), and I can distinctly remember some friends, and even relatives when I visited home, complementing me. Their words and the sometimes interested looks I get from strangers have been a big boost to my self-confidence. Ultimately, I won't ever shake off my non-conformist streak, so I don't think I'll ever start hitting the gym or changing my appearance solely to look better.
I'm in the same boat (except I admit that I do go to the gym to change my appearance, as well as to feel healthier etc. )
But a big motivator was the idea that confidence is the determining factor in finding friends and romantic relationships. There's plenty of very skinny and very fat gay guys who still dress well and show confidence, they at least appear on the surface to enjoy themselves a whole lot more.
Coming to that realisation has led me to making different decisions about clothes. i.e. Not always going for loose fitting clothes, wearing stuff that's perhaps a little bit more of a trend (as much as I hate buying into trends).
Very true. I used to despise Abercrombie and Hollister because they put huge logos/brand names on their clothes. I still dislike them, but now I play it smart and look for high quality brands that are subtle. Anything bigger than the traditional Polo logo is too much.
Yeah, I don't think it's the brand itself, but the quality and cut that matters.
If you look at ASOS for example, there are brand names and they also offer their own line of clothes. Then looking at their style guides etc. the models are wearing stuff that doesn't necessarily show any sort of brand.
I feel like I make a cute, femmey, gay boy, yess, not my own personal type, probz, but definitely some gay guys' type (twink lovaas)! But as a girl, at my peak and best, I am extremely beautiful, I will admit XD. I was soo born to be female XDDD. I passed so well, especially my voice which is 110% girly and cisfemale.
I honestly make a bombshell as a girl, I won't deny, loooolz.
Nope, I'm ugly, and I hope others find me ugly too.
Sadly, some people still find me attractive. They make me feel really dirty.
No Taylor Lautner, but I'm pretty happy with myself. If I could I may change a few things, otherwise I'm content.
I'm really down on my appearance at the moment. It seems like everywhere I look I see people talking about how important physical attraction is to them, and of course those poor ugly people need to be loved, and someone will settle for them one day!
Thanks. Really inspiring for us unattractive people.
I'm aware that I have socially accepted looks. White, thin, tall. But that might change a little as I am gaining weight.
Up until I was about 17/18 I never really thought about my level of attractiveness. I figured I was just an average guy and was never insecure or overly confident. When I started college and started teaching in secondary school for my internship, I got really insecure and self concious. This is probably partially because I started getting acne but also because I became super aware of my fairly big nose. I always felt like the pupils were constantly judging me. It's partially the reason I quit the course.
I've felt insecure up until about halfway through last year, and at some point I just started accepting that I wasn't all that attractive and I just returned to feeling average again, not really minding it. This year, since I've started being myself more and dating guys, I figured that people actually do find me rather attractive, and I feel way more confident. There's still the things about my appearance that I dislike, I still have days on which I look into the mirror and think dear god... but I guess everyone does. Since I've realized that people find me attractive, I'm less concious about my nose and the acne I still have sometimes, too.
physically no, not attractive .. but not ugly either
personality deff not attractive
I feel fat, so that's a minus, but I DO think I have an amazing personality, seeing how people tend to like me. Oh gawd I sound like a little ego-freak.
When it comes to self-worth, yes I find myself attractive. Perceiving myself as another individual I'd have to judge the attractiveness of... it's a wash.
I'm pretty content with my looks ^.^
If I could date myself, I totally would. XD
In all honesty though, I have reservations about my body just like everyone else - I'm on the chubby side, so it's hard to be confident all the time. But mostly, yes, I would say I find myself pretty attractive.
Me... Not really... I think I have a cute-ish face but I wouldn't be attracted to my skin or hair colour or other physical traits
I find myself attractive in both looks and personality. I say this not because I want to seem like I'm really arrogant with a huge-ego, but simply because I find it so much easier to navigate through the confusions of life if I am my own best friend. I understand that for a lot of people, this way of thinking is not easy. I guess you could say that I'm 'lucky', as I've always felt extremely self-confident. I try my best not to let my faults and insecurities get to me, and I really try hard to help others see the best in themselves. I find it heart-breaking that a lot of people simply can't see their own beauty...
"Self Confidence breeds relationships", eh; yeah okay. Not at all...