When did you realise you were gay? or have you always known?

Thinking back now I had like crushes on guys and found them attractive ever since I can remember but I just thought that was how everyone felt about their freinds, I didn't really understand my feelings for them I guess.
It wasn't really until I was about 13 that I realised that I liked those guys as more than friends.

 

I don't even know... I'm sure some part of me knew all through high school. I remember telling myself I would get married and have kids and then come out, so I think I must have known. But I definitely convinced myself it was jealousy or admiration, not attraction at least in middle school.

 

I've only come to terms with my orientation in the last four weeks.

 

I've known since the beginning if high school that I was not straight. It took me a while to figure out that I was bisexual though. But when I figured it out, I looked back through my life and realized that I had had crushes on both sexes. I'm just now coming out.

 

I remember always being rather enamored of other women, but I thought that was something that all girls did, until I came across the concept of bisexuality when I was about 12. I then realized taht I was probably bi. I told a few people and didn't get the best reaction so that sent me right back into the closet. At nineteen though, after years of having very little attraction to anyone, I fell in love with another girl. I realized then that I was most likely a lesbian.

I'm only now coming to terms with it though, because I tried to be straight for about 4 years.

 

When I started masturbating to gay porn in the summer after 6th grade. (I started masturbating to straight porn when I was 16, ironically, but I do this much less often). I'm still in the closet, partly because I have dated women and found the relationships to be emotionally and sexually satisfying, but I definitely lean more towards gay than bi, at least sexually.

I guess there were some signs when I was a little kid. I liked to play with Barbies (although this could have been because my best friend from the house next to us was a girl and I would always go over to her house and we, along with her sister, would play with Barbies).

Also, when I was about 5, I had this crazy theory that little boys grew up to be women and little girls grew up to be men, which I told my mom at that age.

Also, the first time I watched porn with my friends in 6th grade, I remember not liking lesbian porn, but at the time I had no idea why. I honestly don't remember if I were looking at the guy or the girl in porn at that point.

 

I have no real cemented idea on mine. I was twelve approaching thirteen, I had kissed a girl, but it felt odd, so I starting thinking about guys and if it would feel weird or more satisfying to kiss them instead of girls. But how I was going to know? I tricked a guy into coming with me to somewhere private and I kissed him there. He didn't appreciate it (and I don't know what I was thinking, he wasn't that attractive), but I loved it and it felt so right and special.

Of course, I denied I was gay after that and kept up with any pretense that I was going to grow up and straighten out, perving on women and falling in love with them and all that stuff.

Yet it never did and I kept having gay thoughts afterwards in high school, even though I identified as straight or asexual at that point. Only during my GCSEs or so did I realise that I was in fact gay. It's taken me a while to come out, but I'm almost there.

That's genius.

 

The first real inkling was probably late in high school when I developed a mini-crush on at least one guy in one of my classes. At the time I don't think I processed it as such, though. But, even before that, I'm pretty sure that when I started watching porn I was always subconsciously more focused on the guys more than the girls. It took a LONG time for me to realize that I had sexual interest in other guys beyond mere "curiosity" about fellow males. It was towards the end of college that the desire became obvious.

 

I personally only realized in April of this year... but when I look back, I think it was obvious.
Of course I had thoughts that I might be as early as well, like, 11-12. Only I denied it and rejected that part of myself... hell, that might've been a major part of my depression was me rejecting myself.

Anyway, I realized when I was 16 and a half or so, and I'm turning 17 later this month. Came out last month

 

When I was quite young (in primary school), I remember thinking that only girls could be beautiful and I didn't get how girls could like guys. But then when I was 11 or 12 I got this crush on a boy in my English class and I only really thought about guys but it took me a while to realise that wasn't what other guys thought about and it wasn't til I was about 14/15 that I accepted that I liked guys and it was a phase. But I never really thought about what that meant as it wasn't really a huge part of my life. It's only fairly recently that I've seen myself as gay and started wanting to do anything about it. That makes me a very slow developer I guess.

 

When I was a kid (not even 10 yet) I would occasionally see a boy and, for some reason, feel like I wanted to be friends with him. I remember thinking in the back of my head thinking they were cute, but I never addressed those thoughts.
I didn't pay any attention to boys in middle school because they were all jerks (I can't actually think of a word strong enough to describe them), so I'd ignore them as much as I could. There may have been a few I thought were cute, but I never paid attention.

In high school those thoughts became a little more graphic, which is when I actually started to actively deny any such feelings.

It wasn't until about five months ago I started to realize I wasn't straight, and only about a month ago I started to consider that I might be gay and not bi.

 

i guess it was about 12. when my first time watched porn, i thought i liked it cuz the hot actress, but i found i was attracted by the actor and actress both
sometimes i thought men are much sexier than women.

 

I feel like I've answered this before, but I don't see the reply flag that's on everything I have posted on, so.... here goes!

I figured it out pretty early on, like 11 or 12. The way I realized it was rather interesting. I knew I liked looking at boys, but at that age I thought I was just comparing faces body types, etc. When I started sneaking across the basement to get the encyclopedias labeled "M," "D," and "S," for Michelangeo, David, and the Sistine Chapel respectively, because they had pictures of the art, I kinda figured it went beyond comparison. Admittedly, I didn't figure out the actual name of the orientation for a while, but I had already had it ingrained in me by my parents/church that only guy/girl relationships were good, and all others were bad... *sigh*

 

I was reading a book and it had a character who was lesbian and I started thinking... I couldnt get the idea out of my head and then i just kept thinking about it and i was like yea thats me im gay... i really should have realzed before! haha so manyclues!

 

i had a crush on a boy in 3rd grade. the end lol

 

Interesting question. Looking back now i remember liking a boy in the fifth grade. I didn't know why but I just liked looking at him and being close to him. After that it pretty much faded away and I didn't think about it at all during high school. I suppose I subconsciously thought it was a phase or whatever. I was about 19 or 20 when I first started seriously thinking about what it meant for my future.

As recently as last year I questioned whether I was realy gay, but then I tried to remember whether I ever felt about a woman the way i've felt about some of the guys inn my life and I never have. I can look at a beautiful woman and appreciate her beauty, but some men make me really feel something. If I smile at a cute guy and he smiles back it's like little butterflies of happiness are smoking pot in my stomach and becoming deliriously happy.

 

Indeed, good question.

I think that I've always known that something was different about me, but I think I attributed it entirely to my personality and gender expression and didn't consider sexuality. Growing up, I was much more quiet and bookish than other boys and believed that was what distinguished me from them. It wasn't until adolescence that I realized that my sexual orientation was an additional factor.

 

around 11 when I first realised how attracted I was to topless boys with 6pac abs. At 13 I realised that instead of fighting myself if i liked females or males more that i'm just bisexual

 

Well, I was about 9 I had a weird facination with guy's..

So it was about when I was 10-11 that I came out and decided to say I was gayx3

 

I started to check guys out when once I hit puberty. It took a few years after that to realize I was gay. now that I look back on my childhood I can see some things that could point to me being gay, but I wonder if these things only stand out now that I admit I'm gay. I mean I did have a steady girlfriend in kindergarten haha.