Thanks guys. It's still hard. There's not a day goes past without me thinking about how I have found myself in the place I am in in life. I think back to the nights I'd lie in bed and think about what it would be like to sleep with another man; to hold him or come home to him after work. I used to just think it was a fantasy - a dream that I'd never experience and, in truth, I'd never have made the conscious decision to break from my family on the 'off-chance' how I felt was real. Sometimes it takes something so compelling that you have no choice but to face what's there. And then deal with it. When your back is against the wall you have to do what's right for you. I figure it'll always find a way out if you try and force yourself into a way of life or make a choice that you know is, deep down, inherently not right for you. I'm just taking each day and week as I find it. Maybe in a few months I'll feel more able to start planning ahead a bit further. Until then - going with the flow is fine.