1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Can gay and straight men be true friends?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Joe2001, Feb 7, 2018.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

Page 1 of 8
  1. Joe2001

    Joe2001
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2017
    Messages:
    906
    Likes Received:
    32
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Asked this on Monday on another forum. Got things from a more straight POV, so now asking here for a gay POV.

    I'm in 2 worlds over this. Personally, I cannot imagine having a true friendship with a straight guy, although I do know that other ones have worked. The "bromance" between Courtney Act and Andrew Brady on the recent CBB UK series has triggered this question
    Can anyone give me some input?
     
    #1 Joe2001, Feb 7, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2018
  2. the prince

    the prince
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2013
    Messages:
    65
    Likes Received:
    9
    Location:
    Syria
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I can't see why it wouldn't work if the straight guy was okay with gays and the gay guy didn't have sexual/emotional feelings for his straight friend or he had them under control :3.
    My best friend is straight and knows l am gay, so l guess there is no rules here.
     
    #2 the prince, Feb 7, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2018
  3. Jackie Ray

    Jackie Ray
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2017
    Messages:
    499
    Likes Received:
    77
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Yes of course, I have been friends with the straight couple downstairs for nearly 10 years, its nonsense to think otherwise.
     
    #3 Jackie Ray, Feb 7, 2018
  4. OGS

    OGS
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2014
    Messages:
    2,716
    Likes Received:
    728
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Absolutely. As long as both are secure in their sexuality I've never known it to be an issue.
     
    #4 OGS, Feb 7, 2018
  5. Totesgaybrah

    Totesgaybrah
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2016
    Messages:
    992
    Likes Received:
    151
    Location:
    CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Most definitely! Literally all my friends are straight, or at least mostly straight.

    Would love to actually have some bi or gay friends honestly.
     
    #5 Totesgaybrah, Feb 7, 2018
  6. SemiCharmedLife

    SemiCharmedLife
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2013
    Messages:
    3,062
    Likes Received:
    85
    Location:
    KY
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yes absolutely
     
    #6 SemiCharmedLife, Feb 7, 2018
  7. Nordland

    Nordland
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2015
    Messages:
    392
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    London
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Yes 99% of my friends are straight guys
     
    #7 Nordland, Feb 7, 2018
  8. Joe2001

    Joe2001
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2017
    Messages:
    906
    Likes Received:
    32
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I have always thought that straight guys (particularly the blokeish/lads types) just wouldn't "get" someone like me. I'm not overly camp/flamboyant, but do have a much more feminine nature than other guys, and feel that I would mix with gay guys better. I don't really have friends at HS. I don't know if being more open about sexuality would help or hinder me in terms of making friends (obviously I'm not the only gay person in the year, but no one that I know is openly gay).
     
    #8 Joe2001, Feb 7, 2018
  9. BlueNeon

    BlueNeon
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 31, 2018
    Messages:
    176
    Likes Received:
    66
    Location:
    United States
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    If everybody respects everyone else's boundaries, then there's no reason why gay and straight people of any gender can't be friends. I'm certainly not going to hold the fact that a girl is straight against her if we should strike up a friendship, so long as she's respectful of the fact that I like girls. Conversely, this theoretical straight friend of mine has every right to expect that I respect that she like guys, and that's her lifestyle. If one of us can't respect another's boundaries, then that's when a friendship would probably fall apart.
     
    #9 BlueNeon, Feb 7, 2018
  10. Joe2001

    Joe2001
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2017
    Messages:
    906
    Likes Received:
    32
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I can't help but feel that a straight guy would feel uncomfortable with a gay friend, and occasionally, vice-versa. Just from the attitude that I have seen from some guys in HS.

    Also - does sexuality help or hinder you in terms of making new friends?
     
    #10 Joe2001, Feb 7, 2018
  11. Jackie Ray

    Jackie Ray
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2017
    Messages:
    499
    Likes Received:
    77
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    I feel like being gay has helped me make friends with other gay people. Being gay is a like a brotherhood or a tribe, gay guys tend to gravitate toward each other, especially in a small town. It doesnt mean you'll get friends but it does help you get introductions.
     
    #11 Jackie Ray, Feb 7, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 7, 2018
  12. Naters2000

    Naters2000
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    213
    Likes Received:
    36
    Location:
    Colorado Springs
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Hey, it totally works for me. My straight friend just doesn’t care that I’m gay. He still hugs me and says that he loves me. I can really connect with him and it’s awesome. Straight and gay people can definitely be true friends.
     
    #12 Naters2000, Feb 7, 2018
  13. mask1985

    mask1985
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2017
    Messages:
    183
    Likes Received:
    63
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    My best friend is straight and we have been mates for 30 years. I would like some gay or bi friends though.
     
    #13 mask1985, Feb 7, 2018
  14. AwesomGaytheist

    AwesomGaytheist
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 19, 2013
    Messages:
    6,909
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Pittsburgh, PA
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    The only issues I’ve had came from the straight guy who’d never really met a gay guy before.
     
    #14 AwesomGaytheist, Feb 7, 2018
  15. Mike92

    Mike92
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2012
    Messages:
    2,244
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Erie, Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Absolutely.

    In fact, the vast majority of my friends are straight guys.
     
    #15 Mike92, Feb 7, 2018
  16. Assassin'sKat

    Assassin'sKat
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2016
    Messages:
    645
    Likes Received:
    16
    Location:
    Your head, zombie.
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    What the hell? Of course they can.
     
    #16 Assassin'sKat, Feb 7, 2018
  17. kibou97

    kibou97
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2016
    Messages:
    782
    Likes Received:
    15
    Location:
    Kentucky
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Speaking purely from my own experiences, yes straight men most certainly can be friends with gay men. My best friend is a straight guy and me being gay didnt hamper our friendship at all. As long as there is mutual respect, a friendship between any two types of people is possible.
     
    #17 kibou97, Feb 7, 2018
  18. Devil Dave

    Devil Dave
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2015
    Messages:
    1,077
    Likes Received:
    305
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I personally think straight men can make better friends than gay men.

    I do think its important that both men are open and honest about their sexuality. I've had friendships in the past where I never spoke up about my feelings towards men, and the friendship just faded because we weren't sharing things with each other. I've also tried to form a friendship with a man who never spoke about his sexuality, and that didn't get anywhere. I never actually found out whether he was gay, straight or bi. So I do think that if there is going to be a successful friendship between a gay man and a straight men, then both need to feel comfortable and confident sharing some details about their dating experiences and sex lives with each other.
     
    #18 Devil Dave, Feb 8, 2018
  19. lonewolf79

    lonewolf79
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2015
    Messages:
    351
    Likes Received:
    13
    Location:
    Cape Town, South Africa
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    The majority of my friends are straight females and straight guys at work. It sounds weird but that's just how it worked out I guess.
     
    #19 lonewolf79, Feb 8, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2018
  20. Joe2001

    Joe2001
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2017
    Messages:
    906
    Likes Received:
    32
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Can you elaborate on the bit in bold?

    When I go to uni, I think that I will try to avoid mixing with straight guys, and instead focus on making more gay friends. That is what I want.
     
    #20 Joe2001, Feb 8, 2018
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 1 of 8