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At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phase?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Smiley1123, Jul 31, 2008.

  1. Smiley1123

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    I'm still not sure
     
  2. Cool Beans

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I was about 15 or 16 when I finally thought something like "Hmmm, y'know, self, I'm pretty sure I'm actually truly gay." Of course, sometimes I still wonder if I really am; I have this fear that I'll go to college, try to get into a relationship with a guy, and realize that I'm actually repulsed by the thought of putting my lips on those of another man. I've always only been attracted to guys, but it's a nagging little thought in the back of my mind nonetheless. Still, I consider myself sure of my sexuality; that fear is more of a self-confidence issue, I guess.
     
  3. hairdye

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Well, when I accepted it and decided it was time to stop trying to push it back,
    I was 16, then I decided maybe not, then a few months later I realized fighting it was useless and finally completely accepted and started coming out, I was 17.

    But I started saying, "oh dear lord, I think i'm gay"
    when I was 12. and thinking back, I can remember liking boys since I was 5 or so. ;x
     
  4. XXX Lou XXX

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I was about 10 or 11 when I started feeling attracted towards girls but thought I was bi. I think I fully realised I was a lesbian when I was 15.
     
  5. Andrew

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Haven't found out yet :frowning2:

    -Luis
     
  6. Lexington

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    20 or 21.

    So I'm slow. Sue me. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  7. -Michael-

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Ive always accepted myself and never really thought it as a phase
     
  8. ccdd

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    23ish. I beat you.

    Although that said, I'm still thinking it's a phase...
     
  9. MeskElil

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Some people never truly know, to tell you the truth. It's just gut-feelings...and truth be told, gut-feelings make up about 76.435% of our daily decisions :slight_smile: (Aww, come on, you know I just made that up.)
    You're just going to have to go with your gut on this one. Love and affinity is not a cut-and-dry, draw-up-a-number thing; it's really much more fluid and uncertain than that, and that's what makes it so wonderful. You never know, and it's great.
    Yes, it can be annoying, but take the waves as they come. There's no other way you can learn to surf. (Please pardon the overused metaphor that MeskElil uses here...she has lost her touch.)
     
  10. xxAngelOnFirexx

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I never thought it was a phase although i origianlly thought I was bi. I was 14 when i first realized i wasn't straight.
     
  11. Derek the Wolf

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I kinda suspected it at 15, I was pretty sure at 16, and I came out at 17. You should be pretty certain by the time you go into college, but don't hurry to give yourself a label. You are who you are, and no word can change what you really feel, which is what's important.
     
  12. biisme

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I never thought it was a phase. However, last October I began thinking that I might be bisexual, and I joined EC.

    And then, a week later, I decided that I was, and that was that. I came out to my best friend a couple days later.

    I've never had any doubts. Or, rather, if I did, they were all in that first week.
     
  13. Kenko

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    19. It was a February morning and I was on the bus. Like Cool Beans I had the thought "Hmmm, y'know, self, I'm pretty sure I'm actually truly gay."
     
  14. MusicIsLife

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I realised it at 12/13 but i didnt accept it till i was 18...if that makes sense.
     
  15. Antrioss

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Good question. Only you will know when you are sure. Don't let others' judgments tell you otherwise. It takes time to discover who you are, and if you're truly happy with yourself once you take that path. Whatever you choose, make sure it fits YOU and not society.
    Please do not repeat the mistake I did. I denied my own orientation for years, and I seriously regret having to lie to so many people. Don't ever deny your true self: you'll only hate yourself more. </vent>

    For right now, I suggest to not worry about that question. If you truly don't know, just tell people you're not sure. The answer will come in time, and you will know it's the right one.
     
  16. ElizabethAnne

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I've always found girls attractive! Yow! But I never considered the question that I might be something other than strictly hetero until this year (that's weird even for me to think about). Even being in love with other girls, I never considered that I might be anything other than a heterosexual girl. I still don't know if it is a phase or not, but I'm suspecting not, since I've been attracted to girls since I was in grade 7 (approximately 11 years ago).

    I think what's important is not to label yourself if that's not what you are comfortable with. Give yourself time to find yourself!
     
  17. Nanzuniko

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    ...There's a such thing? D=
     
  18. matt3208pc

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    i've always been attracted to guys, i guess im still not 100% what i am atm tho. still trying to figure that out.
     
  19. GunStarre

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    I was in eight grade... Uhh, lemme count down the years :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    ... I was 14.
     
  20. Wander

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    Re: At what age were you sure that you were gay/lesbian/bisexual and it wasn't a phas

    Well...it sort of came in stages.

    As early as 5 years old, I knew I was different.

    9 years old, I knew that I found men attractive.

    10 years old, I knew that not everyone shared my attraction and many found it repulsive.

    12 years old, I knew I was attracted exclusively to males but I was in denial, hoping I could change things around and turn myself straight.

    13 years old, I completely pushed sexual thoughts out of my head and actually convinced myself (for about a week) that I was asexual.

    And then just last year, I finally decided that running away wasn't helping. I knew who I was, and I accepted that. Fourteen years, and I finally came out to myself.