What do/did your parents say about gay people in general?

Negativity I tried to make educate them but they wouldn't budge nd I love my bf very much nd l'll support him in this community.

 

It's not really something my family talks about, but when I came out to my parents the reply I got was "as long as you love them". A few seasons ago on Project Runway(I love that show except for the judging, because seriously, who could judge someone on an outfit that they made) there was a Mtf woman competing. My sister asked a question about why that was and just said "oh,ok" upon learning about the woman. On the other hand, I have relatives in Wisconsin who are extremely Christian and extremely Republican. They still have 'Vote McCain' bumper stickers on their cars, so there is no way in heck I'm coming out to them any time soon:dry:

 

Disgusting

 

I'm not out to my parents, but my brother came out to them as gay two years ago and they're very accepting of him and his relationship with his boyfriend. Even before he came out, they had gay/lesbian friends and family members, and have never had anything negative to say.

 

I guess. I know my mom grew up in the Southern Baptist church. And although she disassociates herself with it these days and claims she finds the priorities of the Southern Baptist Convention out of whack, I don't think she realizes how much of her religious thinking has been informed by her Southern Baptist upbringing. She seems truly unable to conceive of a Christianity not defined by Billy Graham, Hal Lindsey and Jack Chick, who are all very much influential on a lot of contemporary Southern Baptist thinking.

EDIT: I was going to post one of Jack Chick's anti-queer comic panels as an example, but it's just too upsetting for me to do so. :tears:

 

We didn't really talk about LGBT stuff much; my parents even sort of seemed to avoid the subject. Especially my mom. So they never really said anything negative or positive for a long time and I didn't know their opinions on it, until one day in the car when they were talking about gay marriage becoming legal in my state on the radio. My dad, sister, and I were in the car. It went something like this:

My dad: Ah, it's finally legal. That's nice. Took forever.
My sister: *who already knew about my sexuality* Oh, what's your opinion on gay marriage?
My dad: I don't have any problems with it. If two people love each other, it's only fair that they can get married. So if either of you ever feel like you might like girls instead of boys, you don't have to be afraid to tell your mom and I, because we'll love you no matter what. *gives me a look*
Me: *starts crying tears of joy*

I was thinking about coming out right then, but I was too nervous. I came out to him and my mom a couple months later. And the way they talk about gay people hasn't really changed since then, but at least I found out they were accepting and was able to come out.

Edit: They seem slightly transphobic though. :/ I'm not trans, but it's still annoying...

 

Well I'm not out so I can't say for that. My Dad's not the type to really talk about things such as that so it's hard to say, but whenever he sees gay people kissing on TV (Man or woman) he always does groan in disgust and fast forwards through sex scenes.

Mum on the other hand does the same, except she also says more. She doesn't give reasons why whenever me and my brother have asked, she just says "She doesn't like them." No reasons behind that yet. And whenever I joke and say I'm gay she gets a terrified look on her face and says incredibly seriously "You are joking right?" So presumably both parents are homophobic.

 

My sister: The bestest. She said she's probably bi, so that changes it of course. She supports gay rights, accepts me, has LGBT friends without treating them as objects,etc.
My mom: Mostly good about it. Fine with gay people, pro gay rights, thinks they should be able to adopt. She even flat-out asked me, at the age of TWELVE, if I was gay and said she'd support me. However, she has also used "dyke" even though she doesn't really understand the connotations of it and isn't great about trans* rights.
My dad: Not awful while still trying to instill a healthy sense of heterosexuality. Used to, perhaps not anymore, mentioned famous straight guys having boyfriends in a seemingly negative way. He also told me that there have been more gay people on TV recently and he feels bad for the guys mostly because the love of a woman is so wonderful. When I was younger, he called gay guys "boykissers" until my mom told him off for it.

Both are trying to be more accepting of trans* people, but they don't know any of the terminology and are EXTREMELY ignorant on the subject. Sister is good on that level also.

 

Both of my parents were strongly homophobic before I came out.

They would constantly poke fun at us and berate us in every way. My dad thought that homosexuality was the result of demonic possession.

Now, however (5 years after coming out!) they're both as supportive as anyone could possibly be.

 

When I was younger, my dad saw a gay couple and told me that he would never tolerate having a faggot in his family. ...Surprise! He doesn't know, though. We're not close and he chose not to be a big part of my life, so I chose not to share with him.

My mom was less blatantly homophobic. They makes little comments when gay couples are on TV or in movies. I recently came out to her, and she sort of just pretends that it didn't happen. She hasn't made any comments since, but she also hasn't addressed it in any way, so I'm not sure if it changed anything.

Living in the South is a joy, guys.

 

Mom when little kid: It's a sin, and they need Jesus. We need to love them.

When my cousin came out as a lesbian, my aunt all but disowned her after awhile. My cousin came over to our house to get comfort, support, and advice from my mom. I never have heard too much anti-gay stuff after that.

Dad when little: It's a sin, and they are going to hell. With this gay agenda, they will try to recruit you.

Brother: Used to be very conservative, but the Iraq War made him liberal. I came out to him last night and this is what I had posted:

My brother was extremely supportive. He said I was brave based on our upbringing. He promises to keep it a secret until I tell the parents which may be awhile. We usually never talk about sexual stuff, but I found out he was close to having a girlfriend in college; his anxiety from Asperger's got in the way.

My brother also told me that he had studied the Kinsey very thoroughly as his fascination was always video games, legos, and researching. He said "the problem with our society is people think you are 100% gay or 100% straight, most people fall into neither." He also said how he found out that position in the womb and hormones can alter the orientation of a child. He said something about finger length too.

---------- Post added 27th May 2014 at 10:30 PM ----------

I also joked with my brother that his basement area of my parent's house is "where a bi can be a bi".

 

In the past, my father and I had a disagreement on the issue. But it's hard to tell if he was serious because he likes to get on people's nerves for the fun of it. I've never heard him say anything about it now, probably because he isn't too concerned about it. I feel if I came out and told him I also like girls, he would probably tell me he'd be okay with that. He might be worried, but I don't think he'd tell me that to my face.

My mom is very accepting and doesn't see why people are against it. When i joke about being a lesbian, she jokes about being crushed, but I think she'd accept it. However, she views bisexuality as laziness. So you can see why I haven't told her about me yet, even though we are super close.

 

Mom was pretty neutral even before I had come out. My dad is laughing at gays, but my parents got divorced 6 years ago, and I see him every two weeks so he's not worthy of such a secret. Not until I can support myself.

 

My mom is indifferent. She didn't hate me for being gay, but she usually has the "don't tell the whole world" attitude. Whenever people ask me about boys, she makes me say "I haven't reached the age of liking men yet." I'm 17, so that excuse is getting pretty old.

She's also told me my weight doesn't matter because I'm gay, and that I shouldn't worry about my appearance since I don't look "dykey". I'm borderline anorexic, and have a ton of internalized homophobia, so I didn't take that very well.

She's bipolar, and her opinion of me being gay seems to change a little with her mood. She once told me God made me the way I am and that there's nothing wrong with me. Another time, she said there's no need for me to come out of the closet because it brings attention. The same can be said for myself, except I'm much more harsh.

Eeyup. I'm glad there are so many Georgians on here.

 

My Dad, my grandparents on his side, my sister, and I were going to a certain speech by the first lady for the graduates (Oh crap. I just gave away which city I lived in...) and there were the fuckers from the Westboro Bapist Church with their signs. They had the American flag upside down and were teaching their kids to do the same thing. I wanted to pull down the window and stick my middle finger at them, but I couldn't since my Dad would be angry. I just had to settle with doing a thumbs down. We were all talking about how wrong it was. I assume he's okay with it.

As for my mom, well, it's an interesting story. She believes in spiritual stuff. You know: ghosts, past lives, souls, all that jazz. She thinks that when we die, we go up and talk about our life and what we could have done better with spirits who have gone through this many times. She also believes that there are many lessons we have to learn, so we pick what situations we are in so we can learn from them. (She thinks she was an elephant and it was an honor. My brother called her a bad elephant and she said she had lessons to learn. XD) Anyway, she believes that people choose to be gay to learn from it. We need to know what it's like to be rejected...

I don't know what to agree with. I just wish it was acceptable to date a girl. I wanna date one so bad.

 

My parents are accepting of gay people, and i know they wouldn`t hate me if i came out. Still they sometimes comment on gay people, make jokes and put everyone in stereotypes.

My stepdad is a tiny bit homophobic, mostly about gay men. And i have no idea how my dad would react, but i really don`t want to tell him and i think that says a bit...

On thing though: Trans people. My mom can`t use the right gender pronouns on them. She showed me something abotu a FtM trans person, and all the time she said he was a "Lesbian woman that dressed like a boy". Just no. that was clearly a trans person, show some respect. THEN one time she told me about a MtF trans person, and she kept saying "He is so brave going out like that, but ohmygod, he really didn`t look like a female!" she talked about how "he" looked stupid in that skirt he was wearing and how much jewlery "he" was wearing and how "he" represented "himself" as Julianne or something.

It just makes me angry that my mom actually doesn`t respect them enough to use the correct pronouns.

I know this wasn`t all about gay people, but i couldn`t help it.

 

First of all, I'm not out as anything.

My Mom: My mum always seems to be fine with it.
Like, she admits that it would be kinda strange for her if one of my brothers or I came out as gay (grandkids are one of her reasons...), but she doesn't say mean things about gay people. And I like to believe that if I brought home a girl someday she would be fine with it when she knows I'm happy. When the elections were she for example agreed with me that same sex couples should be able to adopt and that they would be just as good parents as heterosexual couples. And she has a friend who has a lesbian daughter, and my mum talks no different about the daughter than before coming out. Like any other kid of her friends.
I'm not so sure about Transgenders. I think she doesn't really understand it.

My Dad: Hard to say, I've never really heard him say anything homophobic or pro-LGBT.

My brothers: The occasional gay joke and 'that looks so gay/would look so gay', but I don't think they mean it in a mean way. More like they don't think before they speak...

I'll include my aunt's family here, because we're really close:
My aunt: She is against homosexuals, I'm pretty sure. She says thinks like, '[This kid in her village] brought home his boyfriend, I wouldn't know how to deal with that as his mother...' and things like that. Or when my male cousin introduced his girlfriend, who has a son from a prior relationship, she said something along the lines of 'well, it could be worse, you could be gay. But as long as you don't bring home a guy it's fine...'
The sad thing is my little cousin (12) starts to sound like her. He thinks two dudes together is fine, but lesbians, yuck...
My uncle: He's totally fine with it, he says as long as two people are in love he doesn't care.
My cousin (18): She's cool with LGB (don't know about the T). She never said anything homophobic in my presence and defends gay couples in front of her mum.

 

I thought it had changed and in a big way.

As for my parents, it's not a topic that came up very often. I don't think it's something they judged. They each had a sibling who never married as well as some nieces and nephews who didn't marry, so it would be like peeing in a fan. Why these relatives didn't marry is something I don't know and they didn't discuss. They appeared to be like any other married person, but that's beside the point. We also had neighbors who were probably gay or lesbian, though single and discreet, and family friends where unmarried sisters lived together for what seems like forever, and they just socialized with them as if it was nothing. They focused on their personalities and not on what their sexual interests might be.

If it ever came up, it was rare. My mom did not like Rosie O'Donnell at all, and I don't think she cares for Ellen. It's mostly about their appearances and more so that of Rosie. My dad would only make a comment if we went shopping and the cashier or person helping us was really, really obvious and the comment had more of a humorous bent.

My parents seemed to zero in on who was a BAD person and should be avoided. I'm the same way. Bad people who brought us down, or tried to, is who they would rant about. As it should be. And that's a different department than sexual orientation.

 

Before I came out they were relatively supportive. I can remember even saying the word 'gay' when I was in elementary school and had no clue what it meant, and my dad scolded me. Still didn't fully understand what it meant until years later. They would never make horribly supportive comments, probably because they didn't believe it applied/would matter to them.

Once I came out things got better. It was a little awkward in the beginning, when my mom refused to say the word "bisexual" and I eventually had to tell her she could just say it. But now we're to the point where we can make gay jokes and stuff. I think the biggest milestone was when my mom was honest about my sexuality to some of her work friends. It doesn't feel like they're hiding me behind some kind of curtain anymore.

 

they should burn in hell
i wonder what will they say about me soon when they know ^^