What are you thinking?

That's really cool! I would've studied chemistry in school, but I took biology instead. No regrets. Cyanide was a reliable method of killing surplus things in a video game. At least in there a large dose of cyanide stopped the organs from working and destroyed all the energy. If you quickly used sodium thiosulfite as a counter they sometimes survived with severely damaged organs.

My average weekly consumption of alcohol is anywhere from 0 to 8 units. I've drank enough to feel nauseous and let's just say NEVER AGAIN. I often got sleep paralysis in my teen years. Thus I know merely difficulty breathing is bad, so... you don't say! Overkill.

Also, set a time limit for FF14. No matter what you're doing at that time... stop. Easier said than done. Be ruthless. I gave up WOW years ago, around the time I came out. I was a good tank. Can't say I miss it too much.

Wow. You learn something new every day!

--

I gotta rest. I'm trying to return to a regular schedule. I've been thinking about mostly cutting out the power naps. It says a lot that 8 to 9 am is early for me thesedays. When I was a kid I found 6 am to be no big deal. Recently at weekends I don't get up until midday or even evening sometimes depending on events. I'm not gonna look young forever, yet I'll bloody well try my best.

 

In other news, parental blackmail has recently been legitimized as "tough love". :rolle:

 

Where do ignorant people get these egos?

To give fair warning, when I choose to put my posts in spoilers its because I believe that the topic is so saturated in stupidity that spending one's time reading about it should be a personal choice...

Spoiler

My mother often speaks in vernacular rather than proper English, which would be perfectly fine if she wasn't the absolute most arrogant person on this planet. We literally just went into a ten minute argument because I used the phrase:

"I will have to move my appointment from next weekend to the weekend following." (Which is the 19th)

Her argument was that next weekend would be the 19th as the weekend that is coming up would be "this" weekend. I tried to explain to her that although many commonly use the phrase "this weekend" in reference to an approaching weekend, doing so is not grammatically correct until we have actually entered that weekend. There is nothing wrong with speaking improper English, but it would be incorrect to claim that my use of language is inaccurate. To which she replied: "You're just wrong and being argumentative. I don't know how you always get As in those classes when you stupid all the time".

So, all in all, today we learned that Gen is stupid!

 

Wow... I really suck at getting to sleep.

 

Yeah, men's room soap smells like coconut. I have no idea why this matters, lol

 

I'm beginning to to think my dark sense of humor may be rubbing off as misanthropic sociopathy...

 

Glad to be of assistance.

 

Feeling like shit, dysphoria is controlling my life again. Thinking i might self harm again

 

Every year, we have a banquet for theatre to wrap things up. It's mostly a time for seniors to get what they need to off their chests. We eat, dress up in costumes, joke, etc. Now, I'm not a senior, but I was thinking about coming out then. There's no way I can wait for another year, and theatre is really dear to my heart. =/ My heart is at war with my brain right now though. I don't know what to do. What do you guys think?

My main fear is that people will look at me differently. I'm an extremely affectionate person, if you didn't already know that. I give hugs, kisses, compliment people, tell them I love them, etc. I don't want anyone to be weirded out. =/

 

You know... When you feel happy about yourself you don't need makeup.

I think I like me without makeup better. More authentic. More real.

 

Fox News is showing its the best again

This morning an anchor congratulated the Uconn Huskies on winning the 2014 NAACP Championship

 

You can't make this stuff up. :roflmao: Oh Fox News...

 

If theatre is a place where you really feel at home, than I feel that it is the perfect place for you to come out. Don't worry about what others will think of you, if you do come out to them it shows that you really trust them, and they will hopefully accept you for who you are.(*hug*)

I have a massive JROTC inspection tomorrow and I'm nervous. Also, we have a track meet so I'm hoping it'll be chilly, so I can cuddle with my crush to "stay warm."

 

Nessa-

Okay, you know how you need to come out?

"I'm Nessa, the name's Nessa/ I've got something to confess-a. The reason why I'm/ on stage tonight/ now I know it's kind of strange.../"

(it's because i'm in this chair, and you felt sorry for me-well isn't that right?)

-

Anyway...

No. I'm not drunk, though I kind of overdid it on the caffiene.

 

I'm doing dishes right now, and I just checked this.
I laughed. I was afraid my step mom was going to come out of her room.

 

well I don't have my laptop anymore so hopefully I can be more productive

 

Has anyone ever gone to a drag show? What's it like for the most part?

One of my friends on campus is wanting me to go with her in a few weeks.

 

I always find that Ozdust ballroom song kind of flitting back whenever I see your posts, lol. Dunno why it's that one in particular.

 

So mum gave me these three things of nail polish. Totally fabulous glittery shit :love: She didn't like the colors on her so she gave em to me. That was nice of her.

--

and I told her about my physical appointment, and she said it was good that I was gettin a physical cuz she said cuz of jobs or whatever(i dunno know about that but...). lol she doesn't know the real reason I'm gettin a physical and gettin set up with a doctor again is all so when I start T, I can just go to my doctor for blood tests and shit cuz it's helluva a lot closer than the Borum.

and as she was about to leave the house, I told her that I told the doctor place all about my name change and gender, and she was like "oh god..." like kinda in a....well I cant describe it...maybe kinda exasperated with a dash of sumthin else? and then she said "They're not gonna--" and she just stopped and I was like what and she just said bye and stuff. and i'm like wtf? What was she gonna say? Like seriously I'm a guy and my name's Ruthven, I'm not goin as someone I'm not. But yeah, what are they not gonna do accordin to her? They were cool about it on the phone so...

I'm still not sure how she's gonna react to seein and hearin the changes....She shouldn't throw me out or anything. Cuz she told me what she told my brother, that she cant stop me from doin stuff, in regards to my whole bein male or whatever. So hey, she said it herself, so she betta not pull shit on me. I mean, if she was a rational, reasonable individual, I'd tell her when I start T...but I just don't trust her.

 

o.o ....okay... Well I think I'm going to go play some games now....maybe