Men for sex, women for love?

I have dealt with OCD and anxiety related issues for many years. One of the things I have noticed about both OCD and anxiety in myself is that they tend to build on themselves so that once you get locked into an anxiety-reduction ritual/mindset no matter how many times you perform the same ritual the anxiety gets worse, which then triggers a need to perform the ritual again. I have found relief from meds as needed (Zoloft and benzos) and also anxiety-reduction techniques. Sometimes when I notice myself starting to cycle I will just stop, close my eyes and focus on the tension in my body ... then I take deep breaths and consciously relax my muscles. It's amazing how much that helps break the cycle. I mention this because to my lay-person's eye your recurrent looping through trying to find an explanation or label to apply to yourself, which ultimately doesn't stop the anxiety and leads back to the search for something, has the feeling of an anxiety/OCD loop. It's like when I check my locked door multiple times even though I know it's locked and then I can feel my mind sort of drifting into the anxiety loop. So the real solution for me is not to keep checking the door to see if it's locked but instead to address directly the anxiety not as a logical problem but rather as an almost purely biological phenomenon that has no meaning in and of itself. I wonder if that might be helpful for you.

 

Hey nerdbrain:

When you mentioned the Kinsey scale, I believe you nailed it. Today it is called sexual fluidity and I know of another theory called normalization.

I'm into men. I meet straight married and single men frequently who are in need. That is the lowest level I can boil down to. We all have needs and when they are not met, we look,we search. Usually we find.

Men can gratify each other in a way that females cannot. Some men, Gay like me are happy with that. No harm, no foul. Other men prefer the pleasures of both M and F. Don't label, don't worry and don't waste your time and energy over this. My caution to you is if you are in a relationship perhaps married with children, the 'what if', may concern you.

When I was very young, if I knew a guy was involved, I would say no. As I have matured, I know the troubles my Str8 friends face. I don't judge, I don't interfere and I support my brothers.