UK people, you can call Samaritans on 08457909090. They're really good, open 24/7, I've ised them a lot recently, they're very supportive.
As an EC friend & a parent this thread has me crying at 5am. It is NEVER ok to take your own life. Ask for help until someone listens. I still cry over a friend who hung himself in college. His death changed me forever. It's a death that does not just cause heart wrenching sadness but endless tormenting guilt for the survivors. And depression. Often family members of suicide deaths take there own lives too. Got siblings? Parents? Grandparents? Friends? Get help! Please!
In case of thinking of suicide over depression, bullying and so on, I agree with you completely. However... In the case of being faced with the prospect of turning into a vegetable from brain degenerative diseases or dying of some horrid disease, I disagree with you completely. If I'm ever in that situation, I will take my own life while I still have sane mind and dignity to make that decision, most likely by taking a little trip to an euthanasia clinic. I won't allow myself to turn into a pile of nothing just to feed the selfish needs of others.
This subject is complicated, so for me, at least, it is hard to say definitively yes or no. Part of me says yes, because I do believe that it is your life, and you should be able to choose how to live it even if that means not living it at all. However, another part of me doesn't really have an answer yes or no. I don't like that suicide is labeled "selfish". I know people that have been depressed and thought/attempted suicide, and I have heard other accounts. None of what I heard ever suggested that the decision to end their life was quick or easy. It was a hard decision that was not, under any circumstances, made lightly. Yes, others in their lives would have been upset and hurt by their action, but it wasn't done TO hurt them. Honestly, I think that this topic is too complicated to have a simple yes or no answer. At least, for me it is.
I want to keep people from killing themselves. Just think, a person's death can affect a ton of people. Suicidal people just need help and counseling from others. However, when it comes to euthanasia, then I believe people should have a right to die if they really want to. If they want to end their life to cease their suffering from terminal illness, then so be it. If they really want to be euthanized , they'll find ways to kill themselves, usually through very painful means.
Most of what I wanted to say has been said,however for those that belive its our life and we should be able to make our own choices, do you agree then that drugs should not be illegal and we should be allowed to put whatever we want into our bodies? Afterall it is our lives.I agree that we do,i mean if the goverment is okay with smoking and that actually harms innocent people that have not decieded to somke shouldnt we be allowed to do any drug we want? Smoking kills more then ayu other drugs combined and yet its perfectly legal. not to mention how muich safer it would be if drugs were legal.I am sorry to have gone off topic, but it relates to our life choices and i have been dying to know what people think,also those who think abortion is our choice then do you also agree drugs should be legal?
In terms of suicide from depression, yeah. I don't think people should be forced to live with terrible shit. Particularly in the most extreme mental health and trauma cases. However, depression really fucks with your perceptions and I'd always encourage holding on. Suicidal people should stop being shamed as "weak", "ungrateful", and "attention seekers" and should be made to feel safe to reach out. Seriously, if you bully or guilt-trip someone for being suicidal, you'll just make them more suicidal!
I think one huge factor driving up the suicide rate, at least in the US, is economic, though it gets little attention. Without the means to afford basic things like decent housing, food and a safe place to live, life can quickly become full of very real, visceral fears with resultant anxiety and depression. Over time,this can wear a person's resolve down. Some turn to drinking or drugs, which in ways are a kind of slow suicide. I was thinking that an overdose is a tricky thing: On one hand it seems accidental, but on the other, it's the result of living in a way that treats life recklessly: a kind of flirtation with death. As the middle class vanishes, and people end up in meaningless, dead-end McDonald's jobs, I think we'll see an increase in the suicide rate. The idea of hard work = success is breaking down, and with that, I think for many people, their sense of agency and control is breaking down along with it. It would be nice to see some steps taken to better address income inequality. Also, mental health-care isn't much use if you're in a situation you can't afford it, which is the case for so many Americans who make too little to really live on, but too much to receive any kind of assistance. I know many friends who won't be able to afford the affordable care act because they just don't have an extra $100-300 or more a month laying around. I'm always amazed that money is so seldom mentioned when we talk about suicide, as if it were somehow taboo. So I think that after a point, who am I to judge a person for wanting to end things after a long, painful struggle? One that may in fact be as painful as a 'physical' disease? If we really cared about helping people, we'd start out my making sure people had access to help, something we fail miserably at.
It's such a tough call for people. Professionally and personally I do not support people ending their own lives. I have counseled so many clients who were at one time actively suicidal. I have seen the difference from an actively suicidal patient and someone looking for attention. I am not personally going to get into the debate of right or wrong. I don't believe it is appropriate in almost any situation. I will however throw out a bit of knowledge for those who think they may have someone suicidal on their hands. Therapists often look for specific signs to help determine how serious it is but frankly I feel if someone is telling or hinting that they are...get them help With that said usually we look for three items. 1. Do they have ideation? Are they thinking in a suicidal manner? 2. Do they have a plan? This is a HUGE one. This shows they are beyond just a passing thought 3. Do they have means? Example, a person admits they want to shoot themselves. Do they have access to the weapon and so forth... Like I said, if you suspect, you can always call 911 as a last resort and let professionals sort it out. Personally when I am on shift I'd rather someone come in and it be false and attention seeking than to miss out on someone who is serious And remember a golden rule of suicidality...be BLUNT We were trained over and over ad nauseum to say the words "Are you planning on taking your own life?" You'll be surprised how often it is refreshing for someone to admit it aloud. If anyone ever wants to talk I may not have the adviser title but I am a good ear and trained to at least help you find a good direction Foxface
The thread has showed that a suicide is indeed a taboo. We don't know ho to approach suicidal people and that's one of the reasons why suicidal people have so many problems to contact anyone around them. I said I had been suicidal and that I was giving support to the suicidal people at another board and still there are members who say that I promote suicide. I mean, really? Or am I just bringing up the topic you are not comfortable with? It won't go away if you decide to not talk about it. Husky said it right. There are different reasons why people feel desperate. People sometimes say that a suicide is selfish. They should ask themselves what they did for the person to make her/him feel better. Did they even notice that the person was sad or desperate? Did they actively try to help, or did they simply waited if he/she ask for help? If you say You are not allowed to think dark thoughts and commit suicide, what are you willing to do next? Will you let the person stay in your house if they don't have anywhere to live? Will you give them a job or money if the reason for their depression was a helpless financial situation? Will you be there for your suicidal neighbor every day for months to give them support? Because if not...who is selfish here? If you say, Don't you dare to think about suicide, it would hurt me so much, it's not good enough. You have to actively work on making the person's life better. Every day. For a very long time. Are you willing to do that? Are you able to do that? There is a lot of desperation in the Post secret thread or in the What are you thinking thread. Many times the desperate posts don't receive any response. Where are you? If you don't want people to commit a suicide, you need to be there for them BEFORE they get helplessly desperate. The man who saved my life was there for me every day. For months. Only he and I know how exhausting it was. Will you do that for the neighbor who is selfish in your eyes for thinking about the suicide? Telling the person to see a therapist and then just asking once in a while So how are you, everything OK? is not enough. If you want to take the right to decide from the person's hands, you have to take the responsibility too and make their life better. I am not promoting suicide. I am promoting the right to decide and I want to shake all of you who are horrified that some people are considering suicide, but do nothing to help them BEFORE they get there. Don't wait for them to ask for help, make the first move. I hadn't received any support from my family. Some waited if I ask, some were horrified when I said 'suicide' aloud. It was the man at the other side o the world who helped me.
