Hi! I'm a noobie!

Hello Empty Closets!

I am so glad to finally make it through the registration process! I guess I can be a bit obtuse. LOL.

I am really excited to find a place where folks can talk openly about their feelings about their sexual orientation.

I am a semi closeted bisexual male married to a wonderful woman who I came out to about 2 years ago. She knows my story, but we are always discovering new things about each other.

I am anxious to listen to many of your stories and share some of mine. I hope we can learn much from each other.

Cheers!

 

Thanks! Happily married and happily monogamous. I feel lucky. Good so far.

 

At the moment, not a whole lot. She seems comfortable and says so. We have not changed our dynamic together. I am not seeking sexual or romantic relationships with others, so my orientation doesn't play into it. Most of it is dealing with my feelings and personal journey. I do have a great deal of same sex energy, so for me I am looking to channel that in healthy ways. It took a long time to understand and admit that I am attracted to men. With help from my therapist, I hope that I can continue to strengthen my bond with my wife and live as my true self.

 

Thanks!

 

I can understand your desire. Realizing we have same sex attraction later in life (older and after marriage for me) is tough. I had very limited experience with guys (all pre-marriage). At that time I was not ready to understand what I was feeling. They say you regret more of the things you don't do rather than the things that you did and wished you hadn't. I wish I had understood things better then and had many more experiences. That said, I made my choices and decisions with the best knowledge of myself at the time. Because of that, I have a great life with someone that I love. I would never trade that for something that I may have missed out on.

 

So, I am often looking for healthy ways to express or support my same sex side. Any suggestions? How do you respond to an increase in same sex energy?

 

A bit personal, but do you still feel fulfilled in your current relationship? I know that it can be a challenge for anyone regardless of sexual orientation.

 

I have a stronger pull to women, but cute guys can turn my head or raise an eyebrow. I think that my track may have been similar to yours had I discover myself earlier in life and pre-marriage. I think about a lot of the "fun" you had myself, but the choices that I have made do not make that realistic or probably even desirable. The fantasy is always better than the reality that comes with all the feelings, drama, and consequences. I am happy with my choices and unless there is a tremendous interest from my partner, that will not be a path we go down. Congratulations on your engagement and wedding plans! I am happy in my relationship and it can work. Don't need to apologize for TMI. LOL. It is probably a backdrop and stuff that is floating in our heads all the time anyway.

 

I may be new to bisexuality, but I have heard all about the unicorn hunt! We're all figuring stuff out, everyday. Regrets are a waste of energy beyond the learning and gaining wisdom.

Yes, your poor fiance'! I'm a capable lover, but being with two women and completely satisfying them is probably beyond my skill set. I like my chances better with another guy as a helper. LOL.

Not necessarily advice, but from my perspective you are free to find and take any path you want in life. They're your choices to live your best life.