I was, erm, *blush* looking through facebook photos of this girl I had a crush one...and had been for a while (not in a dodgy way btw!). And then in my head I was like: "Why do I always do this?" and "Why do I always get obsessed with girls?" and "Why am I always getting crushes on other women?". And then: "Because I'm GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!" This wasn't the first time I had wondered whether I was gay or not - I had been wondering for years and years, and I'd think to myself, "God, you're so gay!". But this was the first time it was like "Yep, I'm gay". I remember it very, very clearly. It wasn't me realising for the first time, it was me accepting that label for the first time.
There was a guy that I always thought was cute, and then one day I realized that I was falling in love with him. I was attracted to guys before that, but that was the first time I realized I was gay.
Lolz that was a good one, should of thought of that one. As for when I first realized i was gay......i can't remember that far back, was really, really, REALLY young.
One time I was staring at this cute guy at this water park, and I just thought "No...this isn't happening..."
First time I was alone with a computer & an Internet connection.....my searches cured years of denial. lol
A lot of denial, and confusion, and going back and forth. What finally made me accept it was (Don't laugh) Door in the Floor. I saw that movie, and went online to look up pictures of the guy. All the forums were talking about how cute the mom was. I was like, there is no way I'm straight. I need to stop pretending...
This one time,at summer camp... I was 14,had these weird feelings for this girl. We were in her tent and ,she kissed me,I kissed her and the rest,is HERSTORY!
The first time I said to myself "I'm gay" was right before I was going to leave to go to a high school basketball game. I had just logged off EC (I had thought I was bi at that time), and was reaching for my car keys and it just sorta hit me. But the first time I realized I liked guys was either when I was sleeping over at a friends house and really, really wanted to do something (sexual, obviously) with him, or when I was changing in the locker room and I realized I was checking out one of my friends.
There was a moment, about a year or something before I came out, and it was just an "OMG, I'm gay..... but nobody can know", sorta thang. I think it was caused by dwelling on some girl, that I'd had a crush on for a couple of years. Yeah, denial ain't fun :dry:
in my case there wasn't really a 'defining moment' - it was more of a gradual thing - starting with 'what if', and just talking, reading up on the subject, and eventually realising that i probably was. Since then it's just been gettin closer to acepting myself!
It was shortly after finding EC that it sort of hit me one day in my library at school. I was just sitting there and I was thinking about random stuff and how it all fits that I might be gay. It was a very confusing time for me, mainly because I had a hard time accepting it and how I would tell my friends if I was. Long story short, I accepted it to myself shortly when one of my girl friends dragged it out of me and I came out to her.
Started having "erotic" dreams about guys in high school, and then it was all sort of downhill from there. I didn't really accept it about myself until I was about 24 though.
When me and my friend (who I'd told I was bi) were discussing people we liked/thought were hot, and we both twigged at the same moment that I was only talking about guys, and he just looked at me and said "You're really not bi are you." and I just went "Nah," and we carried on. Although realizing I liked guys was when I was on bebo and found a picture of a gay guy in the year above with his bf, realized I liked what I saw and out loud to an empty room just swore loudly. Both pretty vivid memories actually.