Questions? Maybe over thing this...

I am not a woman, so take any advice I may have with a grain of salt. The first thing, you want to be comfortable with yourself first, so if you prefer to dress and act traditionally feminine or at least in ways that men would find attractive, then do that. Do not try to change yourself to try to attract a woman because you think that is what they would want out of a partner. Maybe they would, but if they did and you felt that wasn't you, it's every bit as much a disaster as it would be if you were trying to attract a man. And how could you find a partner if you can't make friends with anybody first? I don't know, I have the same problem, but for probably different reasons. Or maybe there is some overlap. How do you feel about going out to meet people, whether that be for friendship or romance? What kinds of places are you comfortable going out to?

 

It's not unusual for straight people who are accepting to also find same sex relationships as cringeworthy or gross. My ex's mother and sister both accept her and love her very much but both would turn there nose up at the thought of intimacy with another woman. I wouldn't put too much consideration into this.

I think a female would know the signs? but maybe some, like a straight woman, might not be expecting it from a woman so they may not pay attention at first until someone else points it out. this is changing through. My own mother, who is attractive, is starting to notice when other women pay that kind of attention to her. 20 years ago she may not have even paid attention, but she does now. A sign of the times. I also don't think you're bad for behaving that way. I suppose if you were being way to forward or flirty with someone who is not available, that would be different, or someone who has already made it clear they are not into you, or not into women.

I don't see how your ex can be bias and therefore does not count. That's not being fair to your ex and his own ability to spot and see attractive people. Like he's some odd person for thinking you are attractive but other people who might think you are are justified for feeling that way because they are not bias? I don't understand your logic here. What you are looking for I think is a second opinion. And if that new avatar picture is you, then yes, you are attractive for sure. You have nothing to worry about, even from younger gay women. I would say that for women physical attraction is less important on average than with men. But first impressions are still a thing, even for women.

I think straight men are far different than queer women. The attention I get from a guy is very different in consistency and intensity. A man can be relentless or super passive depending on the type. They either throw caution to the wind, or are so concerned about being a creep they completely go the other way and practically ignore you, even coming off as dismissive. Women tend to be more evenly keeled. Not so intend or so dismissive. Maybe we are not as concerned about how we present ourselves? There are always exceptions of course. Women have just as many personality types as men, so there is that. I imagine I've not even experienced most types.

 

I don’t think your questions are silly at all. I think that everyone is different in their own way. I don’t think females give off signals that only straight men can see it is just that society deems that is who they are usually aimed at. I’m not saying all women are great at reading the signs but as long as they are looking for them there is no reason they can’t see them.

I agree that these things are hard to imagine and usually much more natural when they happen in real life.

 

Well, I suppose it is common for str8 people who dont have any lgbtq+ contacts in their lifes, to not being able to 'accept' or to find some things cringe or strange because they have never experienced them. I mean, to an extent, it makes sense as long as their intentions are fine...