Good evening my EC family. So some will know some of the various questions I've asked over the past couple years, some may not. But here I am with another one. Been with my partner closing in on three years now, love him a lot. We've taken trips, talked about everything from marriage to kids, etc etc. Parents love him. We're both very independent people, him maybe a bit more than me but he knows everything about me and accepts me for who I am (even if I'm a tad clingy lol). While we are not moved in yet, that is to come (part of the difficulty is we both live in parts of our city that make it easy for us to go into the office when needed - different jobs - while also accessing various services near to each of our locations. Plus I own my home while he rents (for a substantially amazing rate for the city we live in) and so it's sort of a in limbo part of our life, but otherwise, things are great. And after a lot of soul-searching/thinking/etc I decided this was the year I would propose. Even if we wait until we finally move in before we get married, I just feel like at this point why wait to pop the question? The question I'm coming to you all with is...when. I know the age old mantra to not ask the same date as your anniversary of dating, or making it corny by asking on Valentine's or birthdays, let them have their own celebrations aspect. What I had been considering was March as that was the month I officially asked to be boyfriends (though mind we had really been dating since summer 2021). We celebrate the summer date as our anniversary and the March one isn't really celebrated. As such I thought could be somewhat good timing as doesn't take away from our actual anniversary while still is kind of a special time overall. But I'm always open to opinions...I should note I also haven't got the ring yet haha, I hope whatever I get he likes cause he's also not a big ring guy (never seen him wear one ever so really kind of difficult to measure too though I think I have the right size in mind).
I am getting the feeling you might be overthinking it a little. Unless I missed something, it sounds like you feel ready and would like to ask him. I'd say ask when you feel it's a good moment. If you know he isn't particularly a guy that wears or will wear a ring, I think it would be okay to propose without it, unless you feel it would be important to include it. A possible option could be to try suggesting going together to pick out the rings afterwards. What matters more are the words and making that moment as special as it can be.
Thanks as always Mirko I'd still love of course other thoughts but you very well are probably right. And also that I overthink things far too much lol, it's my Achilles heel.
You can also get a place holder ring to propose with and pick out rings with each other afterwards. There are some cheap rings out there that appear to be higher quality to the naked eye. You can just tell him he isn't a big ring guy and it's hard to narrow down what he would actually like. Not to mention his actual ring size. Some jewelers will sell you a promise/placeholder ring and allow you to return it, if you come back and buy a more expensive wedding ring at their store. You can always give the placeholder ring to a buddy in a similar jam in the future. They also make cheaper engagement rings that are nice and not terribly expensive and then you can pick out the actual wedding ring with your partner later. Proposal dates are nice and all and I know they can be special. But as Mirko says the moment is better. So shoot for the date but focus on the moment and making a special memory. If they both align then great. If you have to pick the moment over the date, then pick the moment. Additionally I don't know if this is relevant, but your partner could purpose to you in the mean time and surprise you. Just keep that in the back of your mind so you don't accidentally become frustrated and it leads to a misunderstanding. I doubt it will come to that but I have heard of it accidentally happening before.
Thanks @Chillton. While it's true my partner could propose to me, I don't necessarily see it happening if honest. Him and I kind of both agreed I'd pop the question namely because in a way the joke is that he's done much of the steps in our relationship. Said "love you" first, even though I asked him to make it official as bfs, technically he had to ask me to ask him cause I couldn't get the words out lol, and he determined our anniversary date. So really outside of asking to move in and proposing, in a way I haven't really done the big steps as it were haha. Hence why I'm quite positive he likely won't be the asker
I also think you are over thinking the whole date. Think more about making the moment special. I also can't see why you can't propose on an anniversary if you wanted to. I think most people would like that.
