Mundane questions about touch...

I think touching is a way of connecting. I love to be touched during conversation because it makes me feel like they feel safe in my presents.

 

That is very nice news. I think women touch more than men. Like if you are talking and they gently touch my arm when they say something. I like to pat men on the back when I great them as a way of showing affection. But I don’t hug men because most men don’t like it. I love it when a man hugs me as a greeting and I have a few women friends that I enjoy kissing as a form of greeting. I also have one women I like as a very good friend and we alw

 

In my experience women are far more "touchy" and they, as well as I, like to give hugs. I admit, I can be a bit affectionate but also respectful of boundaries. I can usually tell when someone is not wanting physical interaction, like when they start running away from me at full haste.

 

That is so funny. I once was in a group of people who I knew and I gave one of the women a hug, I turned to one of the other women and she stuck out her hand to shake my hand. Guess she wasn’t comfortable with a hug.

 

Hi,

I think as said above women are generally more touchy. I am a very affectionate person myself and love physical contact but I am also respectful of peoples boundaries, if they don’t like it I won’t do it. If it’s something new for you it may be a sign of your feelings for her.

 

I personally don’t like to be touched, if I want to hug a family member or touch someone I’ll initiate it but that’s
rare, so just don’t touch me. I don’t like when people randomly touch me during conversations keep your hands to yourself. Women do tend to be more affectionate with touch than men though. I don’t mind giving my mother or sister a hug, but then again the first time I met my sisters boyfriend he hugged me. After a few drinks he hugged a lot more. That was annoying. I notice women would touch someone sometimes when men wouldn’t. When I was younger female friends would hug each other and I never saw young men hugging each other.

 

Could it also be generational? Just wondering. In general, there are always going to be the April Ludgate's (who I love) who really get uncomfortable with touching and hugging. And for every April, there is also the opposite. I have an Aunt who makes me shy away from her and I'm fairly touchy myself! But since this is a forum about queer folk, when that attractive same sex person gives you a big hug or touches the arm or hand, goodbye logic, enter a billion questions that would not normally put our brains in a tailspin in any other situation.

 

I agree women are definitely more touchy. I’m paying attention t9 that a lot. I’m thinking why can’t I be more touchy too. A work in progress. I just don’t want to scare people or make them feel creepy, but I want to use touch as a connector. When the connection occurs, it’s almost electrifying, especially with men. Women, like y’all have said, are so used to it that I want to make it more meaningful, but not sure how to do that. Any ideas?

 

I’m guessing it all sort of starts as friendly gestures and then gets a little closer, safer, and intimate as time goes by. Thats’s my hope anyway….

 

This is always interesting to me because despite hearing a lot that “women are more touchy with their friends” I never have had a friend that was extremely touchy. I also have never been extremely touchy either because even though there are some girls that were friends that I also liked, I didn’t want to make them uncomfortable by touching them because I wasn’t sure if that was something they liked. It seems there is a wide range though of what is common among friends. I had a friend who used to make out with her best friend all the time and yet claimed she was straight.

 

I think women touch each other more than men do. In the idiocy of woke a male's touch is often perceived as sexual and that includes males touching males. I was not at all touching for the earlier part of my life but in a long career in a social services agency chock full of huggers I learned to, appropriately, touch and hug and have been a happier person for it

 

Personally, I am quite selective when it comes to hugs. I'm not much of a physically affectionate person. Unfortunately, due to trauma I have a complicated relationship with touch. Which is why it's quite significant if I'm comfortable being hugged by someone or if I want to hug them. There are two scenarios where I'm comfortable. Either I'm emotionally close enough to someone platonically or I'm crushing on them. Attraction seems to override my aversion as I think my brain logs off for a moment. I actually love hugs when it's with someone I feel comfortable around. Hugs from people who aren't in that zone though feel horrible. My friends don't usually try to touch me. I think most either know or just get don't touch me vibes from me. Which goes for my male and my female friends. I do however, tend to crush on overly-affectionate types. Being touch avoidant and touch starved at the same time is a wild ride.

 

I don't like being touched mkst of the time. I actually hate it. I can get comfortable around some people but very few, and hate it when someone touches or hugs me without warning or if I can't see that they want to.

 

I only want to be physical with people I feel safe and comfortable around. I have anxiety and I have weird hangups regarding things like hygiene, so I have to really like you to enjoy being physical with you.