How do you explain being demiromantic?

Okay, here's what I think it is.

Say you see the hottest girl or boy (depending on which gender(s) you're attracted to) in the world - Like a person who looked like the most beautiful person in the world. Imagine someone who you think is really, and I mean really good looking. Think about the celebrities that make you fangirl or fanboy like crazy. For non-demisexuals or demiromantic people, you, 9/10 times, would feel some kind of attraction - You'd start to crush on them, your heart would beat a little faster and you'd get butterflies when you see them, you know? However, for demisexual or demiromantic people, they don't even have a little crush until they truly have an emotional connection with that person. They may admire them aesthically, but not have any emotional or romantic attraction to them until a bond is form.

They have instances where demisexuals/demiromantic may feel attracted to characters in TV shows or movies that they truly feel like they have an emotional bond with, but that's about it.

A lot of people say that everyone can't experience attraction without knowing someone, but why do so many people watch porn and stuff then? People wouldn't enjoy porn if everyone was demisexual.

Demiromantic is also a real thing. I'm demiromantic - NOT demisexual - when it comes to women, I'm pretty sure. I'm not demiromantic or demisexual with men (though I rarely have sexual attraction to men either). How do I know? Well, I know I fell in love with a few women in my past, but only after I formed a bond with them and got suddenly attached to them. However, I can barely just look at a woman and feel romantic attraction. Sexual attraction? Well, that depends on if they are hot or not haha xD However, with men, if I see a cute boy, I might get a few feels, but really, I normally forget about them once they are out of my sight. I still don't consider myself demi anything with men, just hetero-romantic.

I haven't fallen in love very much either and I really didn't think about relationships very much until I fell in love until I started questioning myself.

So, yeah, that's how I see demisexuality/demiromantic people I hoped I helped you guys understand a little better^^

 

I don't think you can put a time on it, and if you did a year is way too long. I don't see any reason why you can't get to know someone enough having known them for an hour.
Also, I've read stuff in the past that says that women in particular know whether they like a guy within the first 30 seconds of speaking to them, or something.
Falling in love is different, but that still doesn't have a minimum time of knowing them.
I've been in love with a girl before, I knew of her from age 13 having only met her once and thinking nothing of her. At age 15 I spent 2 or 3 days with her in the summer and after that I was completely mental about her. It didn't work out but even after ending things it took me up until recently (3 years) to get over her completely.

I still think that attraction to a celebrity you don't know isn't romantic attraction, surely that's generally just sexual? And then you could argue that if you see enough of them on the screen in interviews and stuff that you know them enough to be genuinely romantically attracted.

 

The problem with love is most people mistake it for infatuation. You can be infatuated under a short amount of time, but real love takes quite a while to develop.

Here's a good reference here:
Infatuation vs Love - Difference and Comparison | Diffen

 

It takes me at least 6 months to have a deep crush on someone, I guess that's probably infatuation towards someone you can't have.

 

I think it's the same thing as demisexual, It means you have no sexual feelings for people you don't love. I'm a demisexual, but I don't usually call myself one because it complicates my already confusing orientation.

 

As a self proclaim demiromantic demisexual I might be able to shade some light on this definition.
But Firstly we need understand some definitions, such as: primary romantic attraction and secondary romantic attraction.

Secondary Romantic Attraction, is an attraction that occurs over time.

Primary Romantic Attraction, does not need time, it's that general interest/attraction in someone that causes you to want to know them so that a (secondary) romantic attraction may form.

Demiromantics are incapable of experiencing primary romantic attraction. And only experience secondary romantic attraction.

This means, I don't get celebrity crushes-- at all, ever. And I'm never attracted to strangers no matter how beautiful they maybe.
And Frankly it just makes it harder to find someone to be in a relationship with.
For the most part, it just one step away for being aromatic. Which, in a way, is kind of a horrible place to be--- to long for romantic attraction but (almost) never feel it.

It is a hard concept to grasp, because one would assume that romantic attraction is
something that only every happens over time anyways. And the label does receive a lot of criticism, to the point that I just usually identify as queer instead and leave it at that.

And as annoying as label maybe, they are important to help explain and describe how a person experiences the world. With that said, the thing with labels or the english language in general, is that it always falls short when describing feelings-- words are sometimes just too rigid.

 

Perfect.