Heyyyyyy I'm new here and I don't really know what I'm doing HEHEHEHEEE I'm bisexual and I'm in year 9 this year. Since year 6/7, I have been kinda questioning my gender and stuff. I cut my hair recently and I have always worn more boyish style clothing. I have been wondering if I am trans or Bi-gender, or genderfluid. Idk what I am and I keep thinking about what it could be....Like every single day! I want to have a flat chest, and I feel really free when I don't have a top on and I'm just wearing shorts Idk, this sounds weird. I do still like some 'feminine' thing's though. I really like cats (anyone can like cats woOpS), just animals in General. I like cats on shirts, I like flowers, mostly roses, I like lots of different types of patterns on bags, mostly cats on bags, I like earnings, though mostly studs. And sometimes i still kinda like being a girl, but I also feel kinda happy whenever someone referrers to me as a boy, and whenever someone does, I feel kinda exited and stuff for a bit. I do have a mix of friends who are boys and girls, though most of them are girls. And I just kinda feel like they would act differently towards me of I was a boy, Idk I'm just really confused and I'm wondering if I should see a therapist or something. So Ye, I'm just hoping there's people here who can help me.
I can understand how that feels. I don't want to give you the wrong advice, but unless you want to make strict changes (like your whole gender), then just be you and see how that will fit into your lifestyle. Maybe try a new name. Maybe look in the mirror in the mornings and tell yourself, "Hi, [new name]!" and see how that feels. I am a struggling non-binary person and sometimes I like to think that I feel like a girl, even if I wear very androgynous clothing, I might be changing that. My gender seems to flux over time and I am not sure how to feel about that yet, but I hope you will find what you are looking for. I'm here if you wanna talk, we seem to be in similar situations. : )
You could also be a feminine trans man. It is possible. Don't let stereotypes stop you from being you, if that's who you want to be. It's just a reminder.
Hi there, and welcome to the forum. A lot of what you mentioned (clothes, liking certain things, jewelry) are a part of gender expression. There is a difference between gender expression and gender identity. Expression is what is considered 'masculine' or 'feminine' and varies across cultures. In Western cultures, liking certain kinds of patterned or form fitting clothes, dresses, makeup, and jewelry are generally considered feminine things - as I'm sure you're aware. Expression isn't just limited to clothes, but can include your mannerisms and hobbies too. Every culture is unique, but expression doesn't dictate what gender you are. On the other hand, gender identity is the gender you identify with, whether male or female (or neither). This is usually where dysphoria comes into play, because it has to do with your body's sexual characteristics and how you want to be perceived in society (e.g. name and pronouns). For example, I know I am a transgender man because I experience dysphoria about the parts of my body which are assigned female, and I want to have a masculine body (e.g. flat chest, more body hair, deeper voice, a dick). I want to be seen as male and referred to by my chosen name and not my feminine birth name. My expression is not all the way masculine though. I like to dance, like floral patterns, sing, cook, watch anime or TV shows directed to a female audience, wear earrings and sometimes makeup, paint my nails, and many other things. It took me a while to realize that you can still be a man even if you have feminine characteristics. You can also be a girl and have masculine characteristics. I think the defining aspect of what it means to be trans has to do with dysphoria and whether transitioning to the other gender would make you happier. For me, starting hormones alleviated a ton of my dysphoria and being seen as a guy in society did as well. It just depends on what is right for you in your situation. Some trans people choose not to go on hormones or have surgery, and that is alright too. Talking to a therapist who is experienced in gender issues is a good idea. They are trained to help you sort through your thoughts so you can decide whether transition is right for you.
