Hey guys, so here's my problem. I'm biologically female, but I sometimes feel like a guy. I like looking like a guy, and I like having the mannerisms of a guy. I prefer male pronouns over female ones, and I hate it when people call me a girl. The thing is I don't entirely feel like a guy all the time, and I'm sometimes more comfortable with being a girl (the only thing I hate about my body all the time is my breasts, I want to bind no matter whether I feel like a girl or guy). The times I feel like a girl I still feel uncomfortable feeling like a girl, and I don't LIKE feeling like a girl. I'd much rather have been born male, and there's no doubt about it that I want to take testosterone when I'm older. The thing is I don't feel like a complete FtM transgender, because of the times when I still feel like a girl. But when I'm in "guy mode," I sometimes get dysphoric and feel like a girl stuck inside a guy's body, even though I was born a girl. I have no idea what that's about. So, to wrap this up, I sometimes feel like a girl inside a guy's body, and I sometimes feel like a girl stuck inside a guy's body. It's almost like I'm both genders at once, only I'm not. URGH, has anyone else ever felt like this?
sounds like me!, that is why i find being pangendered easier to deal with then mtf, or transgendered.
Gender, like sexuality and most other things in life, is hardly black and white. So you might not always feel like a male and you might not always feel female. That is perfectly okay. From what I'm hearing you're not transgender, even though you often feel as if you should have been in born a male. Perhaps a male's body is truly what you'll be more comfortable with, but genders and bodies don't always coincide. Bigender. Pangender. Genderqueer. Genderfluid. Agender. These are also options. And I'm certain that one day you'll discover it for yourself. I'm not saying it will be anytime soon or that it will necessarily be easy. Even now I have days where I continue to question myself. But the important thing, is not knowing what gender you are, but knowing who you are.
