Okay, I'll set the stage: I'm in a class called Gay Drama. Shockingly, there is no one there who is openly gay. Or openly bi. Not even an open questioning person. We were assigned to read the play Stop Kiss by Diana Son. I sleep through part of my alarm, so I am 10 minutes late to class. I decide to go anyway because it is about time we do a modern female focused play. I come in, apologize, the professor tells me he's happy to have me, and I sit down and listen to the discussion. Soon, the question of "were they lesbians before they met?" came up. Valid question. I bring up the point that I believe sexual orientation is on a continuum. Meaning, it is rare really to be 100% gay or straight. Most people lie somewhere in the middle. I mean, it's not an unheard of theory at all. Then I go on to say how well the author portrays sexuality. I relate back to the text, saying that during the violent attack (giving away some of the play here), the man who attacked the women said... And then I started to cry. The words "can I watch" would not fall from my lips no matter how hard I tried to force it out. It just choked me. I took a moment. The professor told me that I didn't have to repeat the phrase. I ended up saying the phrase and talking about how fascinating that is and how realistic it is. The guy that hates the lesbian may have lesbian fantasies or even porn on his computer. Anyway, I go on, conclude my thought, and the professor to wraps up the lecture. He then goes on to say that this classroom has an element of privacy that is needed and we should be considerate to those in the class when we think about bringing up the topics we spoke of in class. "We had a moment with Valerie", he continued. I nodded, wishing he would stop. I know he just wanted it to be safe for me and comforting. I'm not upset at him at all for doing that. I just wanted the least amount of attention possible. After class, everyone immediately left, expecting the professor and I to talk to one another. I wasn't planning on it, but I felt it was expected now so I did. We walked and I did tell him the truth. I told him all about how I had a girlfriend. For six months. It was heaven and then she broke my heart. We had the nasty comments, too. We had people say "can I watch". Mind you, this confession segment was just between the professor and I. So, technically no other student knows... This is terrible because this is a place with the title "empty closets". I feel like I'm being a hypocrite writing all this here. I thought I was stable with my sexuality and as I look further into it, using my spectrum idea, I'm more on the gay side than the straight. Shoot. Shoot shoot shoot. I must be in a sitcom or something.