Dear Mom and Dad, I don't really know how to start this letter but I know I have to do it. Before I say anything else, I want you to know that I love you so much. You have been mentioning in the past that I am acting depressed, distant, unhappy, etc and while I have dismissed it in the past there is indeed a reason. It's because I am tired of living a lie. It has been taking it's toll on my for a long time and now you can see it. So, I don't want to live that way anymore. I want to be honest with you, and I want to be able to share every aspect of my life with you. I'm gay. I've read all the horror stories of teenagers coming out to their parents so whatever your reaction is, it probably isn't something that I am not expecting. From being 100% okay with it to asking me to move out. I am prepared for whatever you have to tell me when you want to talk about this in person. I know that you have a lot of questions but, please read this letter all the way through and reread it. This is not new for me. I have known my sexuality for a long time. I knew when I was in eighth grade. That was when it really hit me, and probably why the bullying was harder for me to deal with than it would normally have. You said that Jason was too young to come out in eighth grade. That he was too young to know. Well, you're wrong. I wish I would have come out at a younger age. Somethings would have been harder but, I would have been a lot happier if I had done it. You're not the first person I have come out to. Jason was as of April fourth. The day you made me give you the sequin Toms because Katherine wanted to wear them to class? I told him maybe fifteen minutes after that, and you know what? It was the best feeling ever. After the shock of saying it out loud for the first time wore off, I felt so happy. It was such a relief just to have one person that I didn't have to lie to. Now Anna Kate and Aundrea both know as well. I haven't told Kayla yet, but for that I have my own reasons. You're first thought is that I have developed feelings for her? No. She's like a sister to me, and when you come out to anyone you take a risk. You risk them never talking to you again, or hating you. She is my best friend, and while her mother is completely fine with homosexuality I know her dad is quite homophobic, and I haven't gotten a clear opinion from her on the subject. Please don't think that this is a choice for me. If I could I would choose to be straight, but that's like you choosing to be gay. It feels wrong and you know that you would never be happy. Well, that's how I feel about dating guys. It's like asking a straight boy to date another straight boy. It just isn't there and no matter how hard I try, I know it probably never will be. Know that I am the same person I was before you started reading this letter. I still love horses and guard and my friends. Nothing about me has changed you just know more about me. I hope that you aren't stereotypical towards me. I am not "wanting to be a guy". No. The thing with being a lesbian is that you are a girl that likes being with girls. There are no guy/girl roles in the relationship. If I wanted to date a guy then I would, but I don't. If I wanted to be a guy then I would be coming out at transgender, but I'm not. I am confident with who I am and know what I want. I'm not going to buy my clothes in the men's section or cut all my hair off. I'm exactly who I was ten minutes ago. We may not share all the same opinions. I believe people are born bisexual. You don't, and that's fine. Some people believe I'm going to hell because I was born in a way that means I don't work like the majority of society does. I hope one day people can just be labeled as people and superficial things like race, and sexuality won't matter anymore. Coming to terms with my sexuality is also what has been making me reluctant to get too involved with church. It's not that I didn't want to be, I just didn't want to get close to a church then have them tell me I'm sinning by being gay. Telling you this is probably one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. It scares me so bad that you will stop loving me because of it, or that you would ask me to hide it. I can't do that. I respect that there are some people in this family that do not need to know, but there are others that I will be open to. I will be open to my immediate family, and hope you will be excited when I tell you there is a girl I want you to meet because she means something to me. I want the same things as everyone else does at my age. I want to get married and have a family. Things may not be the way you pictured them, but that doesn't mean they aren't how I have been picturing them for years. Please don't feel like anything has changed between us. I still love you and, please come talk to me about this is you feel like you need to. Love, Caroline Thoughts?
you're pretty brave saying to your parents the things I could never say. I think you really wrote that from the heart and that's the best kind of letter. I really hope things work out for the best :3
Truthful and well thought out. I do not want to advise anyone too much as I still haven't come out to my parents and I'm 27, but readying something like this fills me with pride towards you as I hope your parents will be. They may be shocked or have more questions to ask but how can they not love and respect a daughter who wants to be open and truthful. Keep us posted, and as I'm finding out EC is a good place for support so reach out to people if and when you need to. Best of luck
Your letter is a pretty well one, congratulations for your courage :icon_bigg Hope everything will go smooth - and don't forget to keep us posted! (*hug*)
Wow that was beautiful (&&&) I wish I had the courage to tell my parents. I am trying to write a letter and have been staring at a blank sheet of paper for 30mins now :bang: But this made me feel confident and know where to start. :icon_bigg
I love your letter! It is incredibly well written, and I hope you don't mind me using it as a type of inspiration for my own letter? Best of luck!
That's really well written It has inspired me because I don't think I'd manage to tell my parents in spoken word...so, thank you! Best of luck and congrats!!