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Advice for being in a relationship with someone who as aspergers

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by RavenWing, May 9, 2018.

  1. RavenWing

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    I've been friends with a guy who has aspergers for around 3 years now and we've grown to mutually have a crush on each other, and I want to pursue a romantic relationship with him in the near future.
    Does anyone have any advice on how to have a healthy relationship with someone who has aspergers? I rely a lot on communication and attention personally and I need advice on how to make him happy, as well as get what I need in a relationship without being pushy or controlling (I don't want to change anything about him, he's perfect as is).
    Thank you!
     
  2. Humbly Me

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    Can you describe his behavior? Asperger's is just about as general as you can get - ranging from extreme anger and communications issues to minor things that are easily dealt with.
     
  3. RavenWing

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    He's just very socially awkward and doesn't understand social cues or body language, and he's not good at holding long conversations or responding in conversations in person or over text. He has a habit of getting really quiet when he doesn't know what to say and stops responding to questions.
     
  4. Humbly Me

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    Sounds like me actually. The correct response is to just move on to something you think he can answer. You have to lead the conversation if it isn't being kept up by the other person and you also have to respect that some people take time to think and maybe that leads to long pauses but you could always just cuddle on a sofa while you talk and that would make the pauses less awkward and probably get them to open up more.