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Would you be someone's lover?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by eMei, Jul 25, 2016.

?

Would you be someone's lover?

  1. Yes - regardless of if they have children.

    17.4%
  2. Yes - but only if they don't have children.

    9.3%
  3. No - never.

    62.8%
  4. No - if they have children.

    1.2%
  5. Other - explain.

    9.3%
  1. Joelouis

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    Having been on both sides of cheating, I'd have to say "No". Never again.

    However, you don't really have full control as to who you fall in love with.
     
  2. Gunsmoke

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    Another monogamous person here, back at it again with second comments.

    In my opinion, if somebody feels the need to cheat then they shouldn't even bother having relationships, let alone getting married. To me, cheating just sounds like some sort of sadistic wish to hurt others because you're too selfish to think of anything other than your genitals. Unhappy marriage? Either suck it up and make it work or get a divorce, for god's sake.

    Maybe a lot of my opinion is personal anger, I don't know. I've never actually been cheated on myself but honestly, I'd be totally devastated if I was. Nobody deserves to go to sleep at night feeling like they're not good enough just because some inconsiderate, selfish fool wanted 10 minutes of action.
     
    #42 Gunsmoke, Jul 26, 2016
    Last edited: Jul 26, 2016
  3. AngelLikesSpace

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    I would never knowingly get into a relationship with someone who is already in a relationship (I said knowingly because they could lie and say they're single). And I don't really like kids so that would probably make me stay farther away tbh.
     
  4. PrettyinPunk

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    While I've never been in a relationship, I know I'm a strict monogamous. Also cheating is against my moral beliefs, so I could never engage in that behavior.

    Eh it'd still be a definite no for me. Honestly I'd prefer to be in an actual long term relationship. So while a fwb (if I actually connected with someone in that way) is possible, in this scenario it's too complicated and unappealing.
     
  5. SillyGoose

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    I miss clicked :frowning2:

    ---------- Post added 28th Jul 2016 at 09:00 PM ----------

    I meant to put no never
     
  6. SHACH

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    I think I would just get too attached and jealous. It's even worse cos they're straight so they would obviously never care for me much.
     
  7. logansarah

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    I would never if I knew help someone cheat. If the person I was dating cheated on me I would drop them like a hot potato, so why would I help someone cheat, because they would than also be cheating on me.
     
  8. Shorthaul

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    File me with those who would if the person's spouse knew of the side relationship. I'm not down with the secret relationship, but if their partner was open to it, that makes it a very different situation.

    I want expensive truck parts and if they are going to give me gifts anyways... I'd trade some sex for an axle and transfer case lol
     
  9. logansarah

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    I thought on it again and I guess one exception would be maybe if it was a three way relationship and if everyone knew about it from the beginning. Maybe? I'm not sure because I've only been in one relationship so far and I'm pretty sure that wouldn't be a good example of a relationship since I felt like it was more of a best friends who kiss and go on dates relationship.
     
  10. Chiroptera

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    No. I'm radically against cheating. It deeply hurts people, and there is no excuse for doing it.

    With that in mind, I would not help someone to cheat. Yes, I'm single, but I don't think it is fair to the wife to be cheated on by her husband, regardless on what I could gain by doing it.

    If the spouse consents on it (not by pressure of some situation, but considering she is really ok with it), I would still not do it because of personal preference. I think I can use my time to search for someone that is single and that I can build a life with, instead of being secondary.
     
  11. Anthemic

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    Absolutely not. If I'm going to be with someone, they have to be 100% committed to me. No amount of money would make me be someone's side fun.
     
  12. Ruby Dragon

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    I voted "other" because...

    ...I've been the "other woman" before, and it didn't end very well. I was left feeling extremely guilty, dirty, and feeling used and unloved. At the end of the day, it's each person's prerogative if they want to get involved with a married or otherwise involved person :shrug:

    But to me, it's just not worth it. Even if they shower you with gifts, and even if the sex is amazing. You will always be nothing more than their side-dish. Their hearts ultimately belong to their significant other, and something that's always in the back of my mind: If they cheat WITH you, they will cheat ON you. So even if the marriage or relationship falls apart, and the two of you end up together, there will always be that doubt of their fidelity. It's just not worth all the drama. Not to mention that you can very well be sued for breaking up their marriage if the affair ever came out. :slight_smile:
     
  13. RainbowGreen

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    No.

    Not only am I against cheating and would totally leave my future partner if they ever did it to me, but I respect myself too much to be someone's leftovers. I want to be in an equal relationship, not this kind of bullshit.
     
  14. IamCasey

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    NO! Never! My Dad cheated and got caught at it and it made things kind of tough for us. It took awhile before Mom got over it. And Dad and his conspirator broke up. And now he is married to someone else.
     
  15. faustian1

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    Strictly according to the way this question is framed, no. The reason is that any kind of a "sugar daddy" situation or anyone paying (in either direction) the other person to be their friend/lover pushes buttons for me.

    Now, if the guy was my neighbor/nearby and the guy was, uh, closer in certain ways to me than anyone realized (but not paying me off), then I suppose my reservations might collapse. Hey, I'm a male. We have that reputation, after all. I'm not proud of it, but that's the honest answer.
     
  16. mattypants

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    ive had this convo a few times and basically yeah i would. im weak that way :roflmao:
     
    #56 mattypants, Aug 5, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2016
  17. Reikokuna

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    Hell no, No way I am becoming a home wrecker.
     
  18. Lallo

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    Honestly, it's not my responsibility to check someone else's life choices. I wouldn't ever encourage him to leave his wife for me, though. But then, I don't place a whole lot of value on monogamy.

    Besides, denying him isn't going to stop him from having sex with someone that isn't his life, most likely. It's just going to stop him from having sex with ME.