1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Why journaling is so important, my Oct 12 journal entry

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by brainwashed, Oct 12, 2017.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

  1. brainwashed

    brainwashed
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2014
    Messages:
    2,141
    Likes Received:
    494
    Location:
    Phoenix, AZ
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    (for clarification, my mom is deceased)
    Oct 12
    a) not given
    b) not given
    c) An interesting reflection. If the Marines took women (back in her day) my mom would have been a Marine drill sergeant. My mom must have known I am gay. There’s just to many clues that she knew. If this is true, and I highly suspect it is, I just can’t believe she would intentionally hurt me so much by willfully steering me away from discovering I am gay. (Brain flash, could this be why I cant love? I’ve been hurt by someone I love so much, the pain so great, I just cant get close to anyone. Fuck. I previously wrote in this journal that Im 15 and still fighting with my mom. This theory has a high probability of being right. )

    Follow up thoughts:
    I was not going to write entry c) because I thought it was frivolous. I came up with the Marine analogy during my morning shower. As I wrote the entry in my e_journal, BAME, brain flash, it hit me. I've been painfully hurt by someone I dearly love.
     
    #1 brainwashed, Oct 12, 2017
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2017
  2. TrevinMichael

    TrevinMichael
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2017
    Messages:
    650
    Likes Received:
    266
    Location:
    St. Paul MN
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Hope your day goes well. Thanks for sharing your words.

    TM
     
    #2 TrevinMichael, Oct 12, 2017
  3. quebec

    quebec
    Moderator Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2014
    Messages:
    4,207
    Likes Received:
    2,371
    Location:
    U.S.
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    brainwashed....I don't journal, but interesting/important thoughts get recorded. I have also kept hard copies of important emails...not business related, but those communications to friends that were significant. By far, however, are the copies of some of my posts here on emptyclosets.....David
     
    #3 quebec, Oct 12, 2017
  4. junebug99

    junebug99
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2017
    Messages:
    437
    Likes Received:
    557
    Location:
    Ontario, Canada
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    It is important. Especially when you find you can't talk about stuff. Even if it makes no sense writing it down helps to get it off your mind.
     
    #4 junebug99, Oct 12, 2017
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)