Hi, I've been consindering coming out to a "friend" of mine, who is a firmly believing homophobic Christian (always carries a bible with him). I'm questioning this friendship since he's homophobic but I'd like him to change his mind about gays, if that's possible. He's the kind of person that likes to debate things, so I imagine that if I come out to him he'll say that homosexuality is disgusting and blah blah blah and we'll start to argue about it. I thought about it and I was wondering: Where does homophobia come from? There are some reference about homosexuality being a sin in the Bible but that a matter of interpretation apparently. I think that knowing where it comes from will help in the debate. I've been trying to think about counter-argument for everything he might say about homosexuality so that he realises that homophobia is bullsh*t. For example, if he bring sodomy, I can say that's it's none of his business. I haven't read the Bible and I don't believe in God's existence or non-existence. But that's not the issue here anyway. Also, if he doesn't change his mind (and I doubt he will), I won't loose my time with him anymore. If he's homophobic, it's his problem, not mine. I just want to offer him an occasion to change his mind before I "unfriend" him, if that makes sense.
I'd say the root comes from the basic human fear of the unknown. What we don't understand scares us, people like him just latch on the bible and use it as an excuse not to get past that fear. i'd like to say, that, even though it may scare us at first, we're sentient and reasoning beings who have got past pure instinct and can learn to overcome our natural barriers and fears. There is no excuse for discrimination of any kind
Homophobia is usually a learned belief where the person has been taught or brought up in an environment that opposes homosexuality. The beliefs from their closest have rubbed off onto them and in years to come, after having been brought up by people who have told them that it's wrong, how do you think they're going to react to this change? Sometimes, they'll be straight but because of their ignorance/lack of knowledge about it, they'll think up weird things like, "he's gay and he's going to make a move on me" when it's not like that lol. Other times, they could be gay and are too afraid to speak up or be honest with themselves because they don't want to risk their elders finding out.
Homophobia may be old-fashioned, yes. But calling them assholes yourself is a very ignorant thing to do.
Thanks for your useful answers! @heyguyswhatsup: I agree with you, there's almost no chance he will change his mind since he was probably raised that way. Also I said I wanted to debate with him but that's actually inaccurate; being homophobic is the wrong thing to do, it's just a matter of me convincing him or not. And as you said, it will probably not happen. @goldenarrow: Thanks for your answer, the fear of unknown seems to be a very good reason (while, as you said, it doesn't justify it) for homophobia! @NingyoBroken: I agree on the "old-fashioned and ignorant" part but as Lukke said, the point is not to insult them (even though it's very satisfying ).
Homophobia comes from sexism. Notice for example how cruel jokes about anal sex between men are stated in terms that disparage men enjoying receivin penetration. (Homophobes, also known as sexists, call this "getting fucked like a girl.") There are more examples of the sexist basis; that's just one of many.
Some of them are clueless, some of them are assholes, some are both, but one does not necessarily imply the other specifically.
I agree with the person that says it comes from a fear of the unknown, but I think there are other reasons. I think people are constantly looking for excuses as to why they are better than others. People try to use sexual orientation as a pedestal to try and rank above others and to claim that they are superior due to a different hormone level, and also once again, due to the fear of the unknown. Plus, society has its way of casting out most people that are different. I think that this is where it stems from, but these beliefs have been passed on through the generations, so that people who would otherwise be completely fine have now been raised to think that they are better (or worse) than others due to natural placement on a scale of sexual orientation whether it be through the bible or other bullshit excuses.
Well, when a mummy and daddy are full of hate they hug in a special way. Then a nazi stalk flies in through the window and gives them the present of homophobia. The end.
People's asses? Those who have said "fear of the unknown" are pretty much spot-on. You can say "religion" and what not but then that begs the question of where the homophobia within religion comes from and that ultimately stems from that which is unknown or an aberration. People are homophobic because sex is taboo and anything that is not "normal" with relation to sex (especially sex with the same gender) is seen as even more offensive than other aberrations.
Not really. "Asshole" is an opinion. I personally consider being racist a very assholish point of view to hold, for example. How come they are allowed to disrespect us but we just have to sit there and take it?
way i see it some smart arse took the word homosexual and phobia meaning fear of something and combined the two Genius:icon_wink
I am extremely fond of this particular video, and I like the points that he makes. I think this might be of some benefit to you. Forgot to actually link the video ^.^' https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRy9mlAsOSs
I think more than fear it's just that they aren't playing by gender norms and social cycle of school > job > marriage > kids. We're basically not playing by the rules, and that makes us dangerous to some.