When did you first realize you were gay/bi/.....?

At around 8 or 9 a male friend and I did all the "adult things" we could do, and I remember liking him being on top, more than I liked being on top. At 16, I fell for a male best friend, which told me I could feel romantic towards a guy. I think pretty much since then I knew, even tho I still ended up back in the closet for way too long.

 

My first inklings that I wasn't straight were in 7th grade when I had a crush on a male friend of mine. To my surprise he reciprocated(!), which confirmed that I was not straight. I grew up in Seattle in a very liberal school so I knew about LGBT stuff and by the beginning of 8th grade knew that I was gay..... but tried to deny it and convince myself I was straight.... by getting a girlfriend (bad idea, made coming out more awkward). I came out in 10th grade (earlier this year) first to some friends and soon after to everyone! I still have to tell my grandparents, I'm kind of dragging my feet on that even though I know they'll be accepting.

In hindsight I crushed on a few guys in elementary school, but at the time I had no idea that was what was going on and seriously didn't realize I was gay until later.

 

It was more milestones for me than specific times, but then I revisited the closet for 14 years so it's not straightforward.

First suspicions I had would have been at the age of 10/11. Before that I knew I was different to most boys my age but didn't know why, and I was never obviously gay. I remember looking at guys but put it down to admiration and wanting to be like them rather than wanting to be "with" them because I didn't really understand it. To cut a long story short I buried it until I was 19, then briefly fell out of the closet for about a year, eventually deciding I wanted to go back into it (another story). Fully accepted myself at the age of 34.

I refer to the state of my mind back then as "subconscious denial" - I'd internalised it so much and built up so many barricades in my mind's closet that I was denying that I was denying it. It became like second nature, I was really good at it until I got stressed out by something else in my life and literally woke up one morning to a massive and sudden light bulb moment, which changed everything for the better.

 

Hmm...When I was about 13, I had a crush on a girl. But the thing was, I only knew her online and had never even seen any pictures of her. It eventually passed (they're now my best friend), and I started getting crushes on boys. However, sometime in February-March of 2015, I got a crush on a girl. I never did anything about it, and it, too, passed. And then sometime in November I got another crush. ...And she is still my crush (even though she currently has a boyfriend unu it's hard getting over a crush :u) I thought I was bisexual up until Thanksgiving, where I just thought for a moment and decided that I didn't really like boys anymore. I hadn't had a crush on a boy in a while, and was just generally more attracted to girls.

 

When I was around 13, maybe a bit younger I'd always turn the TV in my room on very late, usually around 11-12 at night and sometimes there would be 'those' adult programs on and some would have girl on girl content. At first I never thought anything of it and it wasn't until I found out that my neighbour's daughter was a lesbian that according to my mother, it wasn't 'normal'. Despite my growing fears that something was horribly wrong with me I couldn't help but do the things I was doing. I never talked about it to anyone in my family nor what little friends I had because I thought they'd act the way my mum did - with disgust.

Eventually at the age of 15 I started becoming a little more accepting of myself and accepted that maybe I was bisexual and left it at that. At 16 I realised that my so-called 'crushes' on boys were all fake and I'd only said I liked them so I could fit in with everyone else. Finally after I left school, with a little more thought and a lot of those silly sexuality quizzes you find online, I realised that I was gay. Shortly after I came out to a school friend who was completely ok with it, so decided to come out to my mum and nan the very next day. Both of them were very accepting of it, much to my surprise.

 

I knew I wasn't straight when I was ten years old. I officially identified as a lesbian when I was fourteen. My trigger crush had a lot to do with it, as well as things I read online about lesbians and being able to relate.

 

I first realized I was a lesbian when I fell for my asexual best friend. She started dating and I found myself having new thoughts towards her. It was clarified when I tried to kiss her. My first sign should've been when I got angry at the ds version of the Sims because I wanted these two girls to be together when I was eight. But, I didn't think about it at that young age.

 

I think I first really called myself bisexual in my early twenties, although I had been questioning my sexuality for years before that.

 

I've noticed since I was at least eleven years old that something was off when I kept thinking that a female classmate of mine "had super pretty hair". But hey, what was I really supposed to know at eleven? Anyway, my subconscious attraction towards women carried on until my senior year of high school, where I fell hard (And I mean HARD) for a good friend. I saw no point in denying it by then.

 

I was in 7th grade. I developed the biggest crush on one of my friend's classmates/friend. I had never really talked to her before, and my friend introduced us in 6th grade, but I didn't think much of it then. Also when I first heard "Same Love" by Macklemore and saw the video, I felt it deep down, but wouldn't let myself believe it.

 

I think I knew I liked boys instead of girls, when I was about 11, but I was in denial about it until I was about 15.

 

I identified myself as female very early on but didn't allow myself to admit it and started hiding it and covering it up as soon as I hit school. Then in 6th grade I developed a MAJOR crush on a girl in my class. In one way it was a relief because it meant to kid-me that I was "normal," but at the same time it was majorly confusing because I still couldn't shake the idea that I was also a girl. Girls can fall in love with girls? It didn't seem possible. Therefore, I am not a girl. Then later I found one of my brother's magazines and found out that girls could indeed love other girls. And later I found out that when they did it didn't have a single thing to do with guys or guys' opinions of said love. So I felt sexual and romantic attraction probably around age 11 but came to realize I was a lesbian probably around age 18 or 19 when I started college and had access to better books than we'd had in HS or I could find under the towels in our bathroom at home.

 

Ever from the time I was 3 or 4 I always somehow felt like male+male was more natural in a weird way. It took me till 9 to actually think about it more and till 12 to realise I am gay. I just looked out of the window and managed to spot a cute boy. A cute boy I asked myself. Heh? and it kinda started there...

 

I had feelings for girls as early as 7. Came out as bi at 14, gay at 19.

 

I liked girls since I was pretty young but actually found a label around 11-12. After it took me a while to accept ( I used to identify as bisexual ) and now since the beginning of this year I simply say that I like girls more.

 

I first knew I was lesbian when I was four years old. My best friend's older sister, Margaret, was so hot. I dreamed endlessly of having sex with her...I was kind of a strange kid. Also, this isn't about sexuality but, I've known I was Genderfluid since I was really little. When I was a kid there would be times when I'd put on boys clothes and refuse to be any female character in any pretend games with my friends and really, really wish people would call me male pronouns.

 

The first time that i can remember being attracted to girls was when i was probably around 10 and my friends were talking about the boys that they had a crush on and i just remember saying that i was jealous of the boys because they get to date girls and girls are so pretty.
Then i kinda just brushed it off for a few years before finally accepting that i was bi when i was 17.

 

I was pretty young like 8-9 and I kept touching all the girls hair. Got around to 14/15 when I had my first sexual experience and it just clicked. Was in denial b/c of society family etc until now but that didn't stop me from having a few more flings.

 

I had a lot of hints when I was a kid (like how I sometimes made female sims kiss, how much I was obsessed with the song I kissed a girl) and as a young teen (not being as interested in boys as my friends, being grossed out at the thought of being with a guy, checking out girls then feeling guilty after, etc) but I really wasn't getting the message (I didn't really know much about the concept of being gay and I didn't even think that my being gay was a possibility - I assumed I was just supposed to fall in love with and marry a guy one day).

Earlier this year when I was watching youtube videos (some of which involving lesbians) I suddenly questioned if I was gay. I started doing online quizzes and felt I was gay but was still doubting, searched for peoples' stories and asked myself questions about how I felt and what I wanted for my future and then I finally realized it and accepted it (like two days after I started questioning which makes me think I would have realized a lot sooner had I been exposed to more gay media).

So basically when I was still 15 (earlier this year - maybe march).

 

I started to realize I wasn't straight when I was thinking "Hm, if I was a guy, I could easily go find a girl to date. Like that wouldn't be weird or repulsive at all."

A few days later, it dawned on me, "OH CRAP I'M NOT STRAIGHT AM I..."

A few weeks, later, I had this sudden huge crush on this girl I knew, and I was like "Uh yeahhhhh about that straight thing..."

Looking back on it, there were some clear and obvious signs... Like the fact that I was -obsessed with a girl in 3rd grade... I just didn't register it as a 'crush" until later.