What are you thinking?

I need some distraction. :lol:

 

Well, I got accepted into college. I'll be starting in January.

This isn't right. I never thought it'd happen. But besides that happening, I have a counseling appointment today...I'm actually looking forward to it.

 

Congrats on being accepted

 

So... my PC is not slow, by any means... but. Having about ~80 tabs open, kind of scares me. Would it start to smoke? Like... hope not. Don't even ask how i switch between them...

 

I should dry my hair >3>
Man, the shampoo I'm using is like, THE BEST SHAMPOO EVER. And it's so fucking cheap, oh my god <3 LONG LIVE THE [BRANDNAMEANDSTUFFTHEFORUMWOULDPROBABLYLIKEMETOCENSOR] !

 

Thanks! :3 It's crazy! It's a college a state over from mine, but I'm taking their online course, so that works! haha.

 

Love this song...

 

I totally love doing UbD lesson planning with incorrigible colleagues.

 

Reading a blog. This guy seems to have a fascinating insight into the human condition...

 

I am really craving a smoothie right now, but the bananas I had are quite brown right now...

 

Elpana I am tried of you eating food and not saving me any.

 

I think I'm genderfluid.
It's more a case of, "Well sometimes it's like this, but no, I can't explain that to you because I cannot perceive myself as being like that at the moment, but if I am like that, then I can't explain the way I am at the moment for the same reasons, if you get what I'm saying?" which confuses me greatly

---------- Post added 21st Oct 2014 at 06:59 PM ----------

Now that's really reassuring.
Apparently some people who are cis and have OCD trick themselves into believing that they're trans*
Now, I haven't been diagnosed with OCD, but I might as well have been and that really definitely certainly helps my confidence

---------- Post added 21st Oct 2014 at 07:04 PM ----------

And the editing limit ends as I'm editing, great

 

Do you have other OCD symptoms?

 

According to this, yes. Mainly Obsessive thoughts alongside this weird behaviour that I can't explain about needing to touch corners which drives me nuts.

I also found this, which makes me feel even worse as I did most of those things when questioning

 

Be careful. I'm not saying it isn't possible to think you're trans or gay when you're not, but it tends to turn out that the person was just using it as a form of denial. Everyone gets a little obsessive occasionally, and it can be hard to tell the difference between that and real OCD when looking at your own behaviour and mind.

 

I've had those obsessive thoughts and behaviours since before I really knew, like, for years

And I'm scared that I'm not who I say I am and who I think I am, it's probably my biggest fear, that I'm wrong and everything will have been a mistake and it will all turn into shit as I have to retell everyone, no, I'm straight and stuff and that just scares me

 

That's really not that uncommon, you know. I don't mean to be an ass, or dismiss your fears, but just because you're afraid, doesn't mean that it isn't true. Being queer is scary sometimes.

 

Thanks, I'm just overeacting and stressing like I always do

 

(*hug*) I'm here if you want to talk.

 

Ugh.