What Are You Thinking?

The Happy Nappers commercial makes me want to throw kittens at a fence >_<

 

I passed Grade 3 flute.

 

Oh, how I wish I could have you here with me right now so I could kiss you as a reward for making me feel better.

 

I'm starting to get depressed again, which sucks. But the upside is, not eating as much as usual, I might lose a kilo or 2, which I could really stand to lose.

 

You.

 

Tonight I realized something amazing. You aren't worth my tears. You aren't worth the pain that I drag myself into. I am going to make myself happy by doing the things *I* love and trying new things. When I improve I'm never gonna have to look to other people to make me happy. I will be able to make myself happy. You are still going to use people until someone you love kicks you to the curb and you'll have nowhere else to run. That's when you will seek help. Nobody else can give you that happiness.

I also realized I was denying my own feelings. I cried and cried and fought against myself because my gut instinct wasn't to be with you. I tried to force my feelings to turn from obsessive to love. I was happy with you but it wasn't the happy I wanted in my life. It wasn't the happy I deserved. It wasn't the love I deserved or even wanted. As painful as this is, it wasn't true love. As much as it hurts, letting you go has been the best decision I've made in the past year. I will get better. I will find happiness with myself. And I will share that happiness with someone who is self-confident and happy with himself too. I won't let myself settle for anything less.

And to the true friends I've hurt, I apologize. Things have been rough but I'm gonna get myself back on track. It's gonna take a long time to restore myself to who I am supposed to be and I'm gonna stumble along the way but the people that I'm meeting, the people that I'm going to meet, and the people that I'm naturally supposed to love and love me back will be there right next to me.

 

Last night was so stupid. Out of the hundreds of parties I've been to in my entire life, that was the worst. Random people with their random drama know how to kill a good time. >.>

Plus; girls that say "brah" are not my favorite. Keep it classy ladies.

 

I can't compete with him... damn all these attractive people...

 

I'm caught in a bad romance with Gumi! :eusa_danc

 

All of my online gaming buddies have turned on me. =( Gamers can be such pricks sometimes.

 

Failing epic-ly at life right now.

 

I had the worst nightmare last night! It was all about guys that I liked and who moved on!

Well one of them I my fault, and that's the worst one!

Ahahahaha >_<

 

I remember when we talked about the chances that we'd able to be together. You said if it was meant to be, it would be. Sadly it wasn't meant to be. It hurts, but the consequences of staying together would have been far worse than the consequences of breaking up. You are still a good friend to me. I will miss the intimacy, the romance, the physical interaction, but in the end staying together might have been devastating.

I am doing my best to not dwell on it. I haven't completely moved forward yet, but at some point I will, and in the end the two of us will look back on what we had and appreciate it for what it was for that short period of time. We will look fondly at each other and accept that breaking up was for the greater good, and that everyone is happier because of it. We will find new partners and be thankful for them and find new happiness with them. We will get through this.

 

I'm so confused about what I want in life at the moment.

 

The apartment is incredibly lonely tonight.

 

Im thinking about how much i need someone to cuddle
lol where the heck are you ??

 

Really want to cut my hair some more.

 

I'm thinking about my life and how I have a lot of work to do. I'm tired of the way things are. It's time to take the bull by the horns. It's time for change. Tomorrow I will wake up as a new man. :icon_bigg

 

cut it RD and show me some more pics of you id love to see them
i loved short almost buzzed hair it suits me alot