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Well, knee deep in shit again.

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Lazuri, Apr 5, 2015.

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  1. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    So, I've talked to my partner a bit and I believe she and I can work it out in the end. I'm still stuck here for a while, though.
     
    #21 Lazuri, Apr 10, 2015
  2. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    That does sounds preferable, Lazuri, hope you can get out of there as soon as possible. Gosh, now I know how Ron and Hermione must have felt when Harry was cooped up at the Dursleys in Order of the Phoenix :frowning2: (and yes, I'm a major HP geek).
     
    #22 Invidia, Apr 10, 2015
  3. Alisa Arwen

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    I will Keep you in my thoughts my friend.
     
    #23 Alisa Arwen, Apr 10, 2015
  4. Tai

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    Very sorry about that, Lazuri. I'm glad your partner and you figured something out.
     
    #24 Tai, Apr 10, 2015
  5. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    So me and my partner broke up. But it was after a long discussion and on good terms. I dunno, I'm not too beaten down about it, I saw it coming, but I just feel kind of melancholy. I haven't been single since 2008.
     
    #25 Lazuri, Apr 17, 2015
  6. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    So I managed to get a job that pays pretty well and isn't very tough, but they want me to cut my hair, which I really don't want to. In a fit of panic, I came out to my sister.
     
    #26 Lazuri, Apr 20, 2015
  7. Im Hazel

    Im Hazel
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    They can't make you cut your hair, can they? Unless you are in catering or engineering, there is no reason to make you. Therefor, it's not legal, right? Or is it different in Sweden...
     
    #27 Im Hazel, Apr 20, 2015
  8. Invidia

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    It is absolutely illegal and they can be forced to close down.
    Lazuri, I know you're a strong woman, please don't take that sh*t. Either tell them, look, I'll report you if you don't apologize or something, or if you don't feel up to it, just walk away.
    And how did it work with your sister? Did she take it well? How do you feel about that now?
    Again, hope this thing works out soon. *hugs*
     
    #28 Invidia, Apr 20, 2015
  9. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    No, they can't force me to do it, but it was my uncle who set this job up for me and he put his own job on the line to hire me which I'm very appreciative of because this is actually the second time he's done that and I botched it the last time.

    And my sister took it well and she's very supportive. I knew she would be, but there's still that whole uncertainty thing that keeps you from actually telling somebody.
     
    #29 Lazuri, Apr 20, 2015
  10. Michael

    Michael
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    It's up to you, but if you need the money...

    In my case I needed the experience when I was younger.

    Doesn't need to be permanent. I'd just take the money and go for it for a while, at least until I can get something better.

    You need money and a place where you can be left alone. Without those two things, your situation won't really improve, you know...
     
    #30 Michael, Apr 20, 2015
  11. Invidia

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    Good thing your sister took it well, I'm happy for you :slight_smile:
    But have you talked to them about it, I mean your will-be/would-be employers? Would there be a problem with just telling them you're trans* and ask them to respect that?
     
    #31 Invidia, Apr 20, 2015
  12. Lazuri

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    Yes. Like I said, my uncle hooked me up with this. Telling them would mean telling my uncle and that point I'd have to tell my parents. I'm not ready for that.
     
    #32 Lazuri, Apr 20, 2015
  13. Invidia

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    #33 Invidia, Apr 20, 2015
  14. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    #34 Lazuri, Apr 22, 2015
  15. Invidia

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    #35 Invidia, Apr 22, 2015
  16. Lazuri

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    I was working on it, yes, but this is not an accepting environment. I mean, there's a transphobic joke on one of the locker doors.

    I kinda feel like I have to stay a while, partly to get an apartment like you mentioned and it does still pay a lot. To put it into perspective, I make 15.20 dollars (140kr) an hour, that's 3000 dollars (27000kr) a month and I'm not even adding vacation pay. For a job that essentially just fell into my lap, that is an obscene amount of money.
     
    #36 Lazuri, Apr 22, 2015
  17. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    Well, it appears that my problem has solved itself. My uncle noticed my reluctance and misery and even though I worked well and was very productive during the days I worked there, he dismissed me. Part of me is relieved, part of me is thoroughly disappointed.
     
    #37 Lazuri, Apr 22, 2015
  18. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    :frowning2: so what are you doing now? are you staying at your parents' still for the time being, then?
     
    #38 Invidia, Apr 23, 2015
  19. Lazuri

    Lazuri
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    Yeah. I'm honestly not sure what I should be doing.
     
    #39 Lazuri, Apr 23, 2015
  20. Invidia

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    I wish I could be more help than asking random questions :frowning2:
    I guess you should be trying to get out, although that's easier said than done... And you said before there's really noone you can stay with, which means you'd have to get money, which in turn means you'd have to get a job... So I guess either look for a job or talk to your local municipality (I don't know if they're under confidentiality, though, but I'd guess they are since you're over 18 y/o), they might be able to arrange with money etc. (no 27000 kr, but still)...
    Try to stay strong, honey <3
     
    #40 Invidia, Apr 23, 2015
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