I am not sure why I do this, but I've been reflecting on my past a lot lately, just to look for certain things that might've stuck out. And I've noticed that whenever I do or say something or do something heavily stupid, like accidentally stumbling onto them, saying the wrong thing that I figure in my head, but isn't what it is... in front of a classmate, friend, neighbor, or relative, instead of just apologizing heavily and repeatedly, I do that and avoid them at all costs. Avoid all communications and possible contact. It's a weird behavior that I've been doing since I was about eleven or twelve. If I do come into contact with them, I'm very awkward and reserved in all senses. I avoid eye contact, become flustered, and just am very taut. Is this normal, or do you think I have a disorder? Do you do this? Why do you think I do this? Because I really have no idea. And it's sort of making me feel weird right now.
Well I do this, and have done so for a while. Maybe a little less heavy but more or less the same thing. Maybe you could talk to a councler or something, I know it sounds like one of the less radical options but it's a good one, I assure you. Sometimes talking to someone can help, it's your choice though. Best of luck.
Completely normal. Why do people say they want to "crawl into a hole" when they're embarrassed, or even run away if possible? The only real way to come back from irreversible shaming is giving people time to quit caring about it. Healthy or not? I don't think it's one or the other. It won't hurt you as long as you apologize first, so I think you're fine.
It's not your regular crawl in a hole though. It's weeks or months of avoidance at every possible corner. I'm beginning to think I have some sort of social anxiety or some sort of mental disorder.
You mean avoidance beyond the reasonable time it would take somebody to get over it? Hmm. That could be some sort of anxiety. I would recommend, other than therapy, to think about other people in embarrassing situations. Watch videos of people doing stupid things on youtube. How long does it take you to stop thinking of them as a punchline? Probably not too long, as other things in life require your attention. Especially with friends, your relationship with them is more important than laughing at their expense. However long it takes for the event to fade from your mind is how long you can realistically expect to be worried about seeing them again should YOU be the one humiliating yourself. I'm sorry if I'm rambling, just trying to make a "formula" of sorts for duration of unbearable embarrassment related to hilarity of failure in question. XD I know it's probably not funny to you, but if you can laugh at yourself, you're all but invincible when it comes to responses.
