i have this girl on IG that i i we on a couple of dates with. I have noticed that as we both live in different cities what was between us (or i though so anyway) has gone cold and whenever i message her she takes ages to reply or ignores me... this obviously doesnt make me feel great but the worst part is that whenever she posts Stories I cant help but watch them which makes me feel even worse coz she can she that ive watched it so i feel like a creep. I never post but when i do she does watch it too so i i nt know i feel bad because im not in a position to go talk to her coz we cant cant meet up and i migjt scare her off if i approach her about all this crazyness i i know what you guys are gonna tell me...to move one, that someone that i dont feel confortable taking about these things is worth it, to focus on myself...but i guess i just needed to put this out there...
Heya, Have you considered removing her from your social media? From what you describe, she doesn't seem interested at the moment and maintaining her in your feed is only making you sad.
i know ..it seems like the sensible thing to do but i just cant cant myself to do so...its the first girl ive liked that has been interested in me and a side of me thinks this will never happen again and it makes me very upset
I know it is hard to let go. However, it seems this is bringing you nothing but sadness at the moment, am I correct? If that's the case (it seems so, based on what you describe), then there's nothing positive coming out of this. As much as it may be hard to do, letting go is the best option here. As you said yourself Thus, she is demonstrating that she isn't interested. It doesn't mean she is a bad person or that you did something wrong. Sometimes people are interested in something momentaneous (a single date or a hookup), and sometimes people lose interest or change their priorities in life. Unfortunately, as much as it isn't cool to change our plans, sometimes letting go is the best option, and it will hurt less than dragging out something that clearly isn't working. The advice I posted to another user earlier today, about a similar situation, may give you some food for thought too: Long story short, It isn't easy to find nice people. However, there is plenty of fish in the sea, and, as long as you are open yourself to possibilities (which will be easier if you let go of something that isn't working), sooner or later you might meet someone that really clicks with you.
People are weird. I met a guy in person last year at Pride, and we got along great, and he added me on facebook and instagram and we chatted online a few times, but when I asked if he wanted to meet up again, I got no reply at all. Then he uploaded pics of himself getting drunk with his other friends. Honestly, it made me feel like shit. Why do those other friends of his get to be worthy of his time and not me? So I removed him from my facebook and deleted his phone number. He still follows me on instagram but because I'm not following him back, I don't see any of his posts. A couple of times he "liked" a picture I posted, and I sent him a private message asking "Why did you go quiet on me? Was I too dull for you? I would like to have gotten to know you a little better." No reply. So why does he bother following my social media if he doesn't want to talk to me? If he finds me uninteresting, that's fine, he could just delete me or block me. I end up being the one who deletes and blocks people, even though I'm the one who wants to stay in touch. It's pretty fucked up. We admire these people. We see good things in them, we see something in them that is beautiful and makes us feel good and excited about speaking to them again. And then they treat us like that. To them, we are just another face to add to their social media to make them look popular. They don't give us the time or accept our invitations and opportunities to form some kind of relationship, even just friendship, because they don't value us as people. Being ignored is the worst thing. To me its worse than being insulted. At least if someone insults me they are acknowledging my existence. Ignoring me when I'm reaching out to you in friendship makes me feel like I've done something terrible to you, and like the OP said, it makes me feel like a creep. It makes me feel bad for liking another man, and I'm supposed to take pride in being a man who likes other men. And sure, it's easy to say there are people out there who are better for us, and will value us and make us feel good about ourselves, but the people we are complaining about here are people who we thought were these special kind of friends that we've been waiting to meet, and they end up treating us as less than passing strangers and making us feel worse about ourselves. This is not something that's easy to recover from.
