I came out as trans to my family in December2017/January2018 and it went absolutely awful. My parents are strongly opinionated Christians and they were devastated. My mom acknowledged that I had been struggling visibly and vocally with my gender since I was thirteen. My mom has agreed to come with me to an endo soon to learn more because she's concerned with my health and how t is gonna impact that. My dad on the other hand, has not ever been mildly okay with it and has gotten violent in response to me asserting a desire to transition. My boyfriend and his family have been immensely supportive and have offered to let me stay with them for safety and mental wellbeing. I don't want to do this because I know I'll feel like a burden. Additionally, I need my parents to help me pay for my college and they definitely won't do that if I leave home. I feel really lost and confused and hopeless. I'm losing my family and my home and it's so stressful. I feel out of control too. I can't start t because my family will cut me off if I do. I need to transition medically or I'm not sure I'm gonna be okay any longer. I just don't know what to do and I guess I'm looking for advice/hope.
First of all, I want to say how sorry I am that your parents are set against the idea of you transitioning. It sounds like your mom is willing to learn more, even with her reservations, but your dad is vehemently opposed. In what way has is response been violent? When you go to the endo with your mom, be sure to address the concerns that have been raised so far by your parents. Maybe if your mom can be better appraised of facts, she will be able to understand what's going on and speak to your dad. It might be an idea for you to visit the PFLAG website and download/print off some of the useful resources for parents. You can't force them to read the information, but you can make it available for them. Many of the parents who turn to PFLAG for help are people of faith. If things get very heated at home it might be a good idea to go to your boyfriends place for a short time, while things calm down. It doesn't mean leaving for good, or one party cutting the other out of life... it's simply a recognition that nothing is ever resolved in anger and confrontation. Walking away doesn't mean a loss for you and win for them.
