Transgender Q&A

Personally, my chest and hips are what I'm most desperate to change. Sure, I'd love to have a dick but considering medical technology ain't to the point where it's fully functional, it's not worth it to me. But everyone's different. Along with my boobs and hips, which I can't even look at anymore without cringing, I have a thing against my face, which is actually very round and soft, and the lack of an Adam's apple.

 

My religion forbids hormone therapy or any changing of the body but if I woke up with a penis I'd do sixty cartwheels and put on a show. So yes I can live with part of my body not changed. I don't have a choice.And I lived with it 17 years.

 

I definitely can't wait to have a flat chest that's for sure and my hips bother me. As for my lower area, I'm not happy with it, and I do wish I had male parts there; but I think if bottom surgery wasn't an option or if I couldn't afford it, I'd be able to live with it.

 

With me it's my face, and of course, "the darn thing". Laser and make-up have done wonders.

There's also my hormones themselves if they count. I really have never liked the way they've made me feel past puberty. Which is the other reason why I am not to fond of "the darn thing" since it's basically a little testosterone factory.

I've always had a little bit of Gynecomastia (breasts on a male body) and a soft voice. I've let it go back to being a lot more feminine. Earlier today we walked past a woman talking on her phone and my girlfriend thought I was the one talking But that was something that was HUGE for me. And it didn't cost a penny to fix!

 

I think you said that you're FTM, so I wonder, can you ever have a full-sized, functioning penis?

 

Yeah I get it, I was asking because some trans ppl I've talked to say that they have a fixation on a part of their bodies and don't mind having breasts for example on FtM.

Yeah, I'd wish all trans surgery were cheaper if not free. I can't imagine how it must feel.(*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)

If I was going to judge you I wouldn't be asking in the first place, or even be in EC (*hug*). It's really a shame that someone has to resort to those kinda things in order to feel comfortable in their body.

 

Can I answer even though I'm a woman?

I'll let someone who knows more than I do answer in depth, but there's two techniques for men in that situation. One is called Metoidioplasty, where they take the clitoris and enlarge it, and one is called Phalloplasty, where they take some skin (the best is from under the arm from what I've read) and make a penis out of it.

I guess anything else I could say though isn't going to be as good as looking those terms up on wikipedia or wherever, I'm kind of curious too. I've heard some guys say they're happy with it and it's sensitive and everything. Apparently from what I've heard it's way better than it's made out to be.

 

@Martjain,

It's wrong and just considering doing it feels sooo wrong and horrible and like I am a total sellout and a bad representative of the trans community. But I really need some money and I am worried I won't be able to pay for my hormones down the line (I have enough saved for 6 months or so). And if it came to stopping HRT, I would do almost anything to earn money, and I mean that.

I dunno what I'm going to (or am even capable of doing). I would be thrilled if I could get work as a server so that wouldn't be necessary. I really don't like the idea of giving up apart of myself, in that way to some total stranger, at all...we will see what the coming months have in store....

 

Stefani:

It's your agency, so I have no reproach for it, but I hope that whatever choice you make is ultimately fulfilling and sustainable.

For those of you with non-binary gender experiences, what does that feel like for you? I'm just wondering, because I'm still having trouble unpacking my non-binary feelings.

 

I know what you mean, and I truly hope you don't have to resort to those kinda methods, but I'm in no position to judge you, I just wish you the best and offer my support

 

I'm still questioning, so I have no idea how helpful this will be.

I don't feel female. I have never had an interest in acting it. My interests have never wholly been female. Some days I feel an immense desire to be a guy, but most of the time I just...Am. However, it pleases me a great deal when others think I'm a guy and I hate it when my parents mention me doing stereotypical female things. i.e being a mother and having kids.

 

I'll go ahead and answer for everybody else. Yes. Empty Closets. I only recently started identifying as genderqueer myself, so I haven't felt the sting personally. Yet.

Well, my gender is non-binary. If I had to pin it down, I'd have to say I think of myself as femme/andro. What this means is that I don't feel enough dysphoria to want sex assignment or hormone replacement therapy. However, I still do want to be thinner so that I can present more feminine. That is a "change" in the strict sense, and I lift and run to try and get change I want. Furthermore, the mental health benefits from running include making me feel better about my gender.

So, does it feel kind of like being slightly masculine to agender? Although it does sound to me like there's a male ideal self there.

 

Yeah. I guess so. Unfortunately, I'm hella confused thanks to everything I'm reading and my mom doubting me.

 

I'm in a pretty similar place with my gender. I guess to me being non-binary feels like living in the gray-area between genders. I don't think I'm trans* because (most days) if I had to pick one of the binary genders I feel closest to, I would go with the one I was assigned at birth (female). However, while I would often claim a female identity in order to make a statement (e.g. women can be geeks, too), I frequently (though not always) get uncomfortable when people refer to me as female. I love it when people can't tell what my gender is online. I also still often worry that I'm just a confused cis girl, even as a part of me recoils at thinking of myself as a girl (and another part embraces it).

I found this quote by Kade of Autostraddle more or less expresses how I feel.

 

Hello all.

I'm actually new to the idea of myself being transgendered, and I was wondering if there is any advice anyone can give me. How did you really figure out you were transgender for sure? And if you are like how I am if I can get past my confusion and realize I am trans--a FtM--how did you get testosterone products? Is it all prescribed stuff or is there a safe, legal way to get it without a doctor? I have quite a few questions, honestly, and I apologize, but any advice at all would be most appreciated.

--Noah

 

Unfortunately, yeah. I wasn't necessarily "kicked out", but I received discrimination from the LGBT group I attended from December of last year to about March of this year. I had identified as a lesbian during my time at said group, but when I came out as transgender, I was basically told that I was "lying" or "confused" because I still appeared female at the time. I brushed it off and came back the following week, and a girl had the nerve to tell me that I felt gender confusion because I couldn't accept the fact that I was gay.

I said adios and never went back. I would have been the only trans* person there if I had stayed, and I highly doubt I would have been accepted.

So much for the "T."

 

Thanks for making this topic. I'm find this quite informative and helpful.

I also wish I had money to be able to afford laser hair removal. That can get costly if you're not working. I have dark, thick hair that grows on my face(chin, sides of my face, cheek). I also have hair that grows on my neck - a few strands are actually also rather dark and thick. If I didn't remove it with cream/waxing/epilator/tweezing, etc. , I would eventually end up growing a small beard, full mustache, have hairy sides, etc. Although in my case, part of it is ethnicity, and I think the other part is that I have pcos and so it gets especially bad when I go like half a year without getting my period (yeah, I know, tmi).

 

Hey, Tetraquark, I just wanted to say thanks so much for that. It makes me feel a lot better, because honestly, I don't feel like my non-binary experience is "enough" and it feels like I'm appropriating.

 

@Oddish,

Yeah, I always say the T is silent to many people, unfortunately.

@RainSpirit,

Haha, you are fine, lolz. One of my sisters (cis, straight) is the exact same way. She gets facial hair all over especially on her neck and upper lip. We are Italian, sooo, lolz. But yeah my sister is still an absolute beauty who looks a LOT like Liz Taylor and has actually done a small (one shoot for a private photography company) amount of modeling.