Excuse the lame title :I I'm not too sure how to start this so I guess I should just say that I can't tell if I'm gay or not :/ I'm a girl who has a small crush on my (female) best friend, who is bisexual. I told her and she confirmed that she had a small crush on me. But now I can't help but think about how cool it'd be to kiss my (male)friend. It's annoying me to no ends :bang: I have no interest in the male anatomy and could only see myself with a dude for a short time. I guess that should tell me that I'm gay, right? WRONG! I have what I call 'fluffy fantasies' about my crush(female). You know the type, hugging, maybe a peck or two. Nothing much. I have much more 'hard core' fantasies about the male friend. They mainly include making out. So pretty asexual, I really am not ready to think about sex so I leave that out of my 'fantasies' haha. Though I admit to watching 'soft' stuff...If you know what I mean :icon_redf It seems like being 'queer' runs in my family as on my mothers side my grandmother, uncle and cousin(female) are all gay/bisexual and I'm probably gay. Because of half my family being 'queer' my close family have no problem with it. My mum thinks I'm gay So can anyone who's been in the same situation help? Thanks
If you're not ready to think about sex yet (and I applaud you for that view, a lot of people aren't sensible enough to recognize that about themselves!) then I wouldn't worry about it too much. By the sounds of things you have a crush on two people you know, and one of those is more...intimate? sexy? I dunno, you pick a word...than the other. You say you only see yourself with a guy for a short time, well what about with the girl or have you not thought that far ahead? You seem to be coming at it from a fairly good place, take your time, you don't need to pick a side right now...unless you want to try one of them ;D
I'll start by saying that being gay or transgendered seems to be prevelant in my family. I have to aunts that were MtF, two cousins that are gay, and I'm also gay as well. So its understandable that you think you might be gay because it seems to run in your family as well. I think you shouldn't let that dictate if your gay or not; you should take your time to see how your feelings develop for the guy and the girl. Do you have any feelings towards the guy and what are your current feelings towards the girl? Take your time to think about it.
Thank-you for the responses ElliaOkaku, I can see myself with a girl for a long-term relationship. I've thought about the guy and realized that I can only see myself cuddling/ kissing him. Same with the girl(Though I can see myself with a future partner doing other things...) but as you said, I'm WAY too young for sex :/ Thus I am giving more thought to the romantic side. As I said I could form a stronger romantic relationship with a girl whereas with the boy it'd be a no strings attached type of thing. Angel626, It's not just because my family has a lot of gay people in it that I think I should be gay. I was just saying that I was coming from a pretty good place, sorry for the confusion. I've just come back from the female crushes house and it was really nice because we got to spend a lot of time together because my sister and another friend were there too. I got really bad butterflies around the crush. I almost kissed her a few times ^>^ I didn't however because even though she knows I have a crush on her and visa versa I didn't think it'd be appropriate. I am pondering if I should send her a note/e-mail about how I felt tonight... I'll think on it a little more.
Right now, about the best you could say is that you are probably not fully heterosexual. Only experience and time will help sort out the rest. There's no hurry here and no points for haste. Let it ride a while...
Hmm, I've thought a lot about it and decided that I'm probably bisexual with tendencies towards woman. I won't be looking to date anyone though because I have no idea how one would court with someone. Hmm... Oh well. Now I just need help on deciding if I should tell the female crush as the male crush probably won't last long... I also think demisexual would be a good way to describe myself as I don't see how one would have a one night stand with someone they met randomly at a bar.
