So, I've decided the only way I'll be able to come out of the closet will be by writing a letter. I can't do it in person because I'll become a mess and probably emotionally breakdown. I've decided to come out to my mom first, she's the most open to the LGBTQ community as she has had gay and trans* friends. Although I'm not trying to get my hopes up, just in case. But here's the problem...I don't know what to write. I could write A LOT about how I feel, but I don't want to overwhelm her. She knows I've been having some problems, she's caught me stealing girl clothes and in fact gave me a jacket of hers I liked. Which is another reason I feel she should be the first to know. I think she's confused. So, what do I do, should I water it down... But then I'm scared she won't take me seriously. On the other hand I don't want to scare her. Basically, do I present the message strongly, to prevent misinterpretation...Or water it down, trying to make her more comfortable?
Your mom sounds like a great person to come out to since she has LGBTQ friends, so clearly she's an ally. It also seems like it is okay with you wearing her jacket. It's always scary coming out to a parent, but it seems like you're already in a better position than some. I love your mother already. If your goal is to just tell her and not talk about it after, then writing a letter with all your thoughts might be okay, but if you want to open up dialogue, I'd suggest writing a brief letter to open yourself up to further discussion. Just write honestly and let her know which pronouns you'd like to use, without getting bogged down with tangents and anecdotes; save those for the talk. Heck, if she's had trans* friends in the past maybe she's got advice for you. Maybe she's always hoped for a daughter (or genderqueer child who uses their pronouns of choice; maybe i assumed too much by assuming that you'd like to use female pronouns), and she'll be psyched to know that she's had one all along. Who knows. Don't worry about overwhelming her; worry about yourself and what YOU need right now. I hope it all goes well; best of luck to yah!
I did a lettter a couple of weeks ago. I was really scared that my heart was pumping so fast. This was to my mum. I was honest to how i was feeling not being able to be me for a long time. I told her please accept me who i am. I`m still me and what you want to happen next. You dont need to be horrible. Just be honest. Good luck.
I have no intention of trying to be horrible on purpose, I'm just afraid of coming off as too blunt. Generally, although I definitely have flamboyant moments, I usually do things subtly. Also I already have 2 sisters, so my mom hoping for a daughter is not going to happen. Which also leads me to realize she'll take the idea of losing a son very badly.(I do still have a brother though) Furthermore although she has had LGBTQ friends I doubt she'll be 100% open to me at first, I know she'll begin to greatly fear for me being discriminated against. The more I think about, there's no way I'm not going to not hurt her in some way and be me at the same time.
