I have an extremely low sex drive and never feel any sexual urges what so ever. It has made it impossible for me to figure out my sexuality. Also, porn does nothing for me. Anything sexually visual just doesn't get me off. It's like looking at a wall. The last time I felt a sexual urge was when i was 15. Not kidding. It's like my sex drive died and buried itself in the process. I don't think I'm straight. I find other women pretty, more so than men. But all of my child hood crushes were on boys. My last "serious" crush was on a female friend of mine and it lasted quite a while. I feel romantically more into girls. But as I said, I don't have any sexual urges. Not to men or women. I can recognize an attractive man or woman, but I never go "ooooh I'd want that". It's dead. So...some weeks ago I was out clubbing with my friends, I had a little to drink so I felt buzzed but not super drunk. Suddenly I met this guy and we started talking, I thought he was cute and charming. He put his arm around me and we were walking around having a good time. And I enjoyed it. I didn't want him to stop talking or holding his arm his around me. I felt a sensation down there that I haven't felt in over 10 years. I felt like a middle school girl again and it was the best. But I'm so, so confused over this. Why do I feel like this around men when I've had something to drink? Why do my sexual urges awake suddenly? I have been going on dates in the past but I skip them after the first one because I never feel a spark or an urge to continue seeing someone. Like I said, it's like my body is dead and non responsive. I have no idea what happened that night, but I completely enjoyed it and kind of got an "aha-moment", like this is how you are supposed to feel when you want someone and they awaken your sexual urges. I don't know if I want to be with a man or with a woman. They are both pretty in their own ways. But I also want to function sexually like other normal people and it's not happening at the moment. Is someone here in the same situation as me or have any advice, would gladly appreciate it.
Hy there One thing about sexual urges is it could be caused by physioligical changes in our bodies like when hormones shoot up during a certain period of the month, or just random. Second it could be the current state of our mind(psychological), are we tensed or relaxed? Our subconscious mind works wonders. ---------- Post added 8th Oct 2016 at 06:28 AM ---------- For got to say that I've always been turned on by men when I was in my teens to early twenties until lately when I found out I could actually come thinking about women. I'vealso had boy and girl crushes when I was young, but I've always felt more intensely about my female crushes. I don't know if what you're experiencing is a phase, but it is possible. Overtime we discover things about ourselves that could surprise us Anyway, I hope you find your answers from other members that have more wisdom than me
Probably shouldn't drink if it makes you feel better around men. I feel like that could carry on in a relationship. You don't have to feel a sensation or urge down there to know who you're into. Everyone is different. My sex drive is quite high, and so I will undoubtly find myself wandering into space when I see an attractive guy. It's quite okay if you don't look at people in a sexual manner all the time. In fact that's probably better because you won't be looking around for eye candy all the time. Having a high sex drive all the time isn't the best trait to have, but what can I do. There's many labels out there, but don't worry about it too much. I would just look at your attractions as such. Being in a relationship for almost a year has pretty much told me that I'm gay. Discovering your orientation is a process that takes time. All will be well in the end.
