ok, so i have a few questions about the every day things about being gay. first: dancing- in classical dancing, who leads? i really have no clue and really want to know. second: how does chivalry work? like those old guy- girl things like the guy picks up the check on a date, and if your girlfriend is cold, give her your jacket. how does that worl with two guys
It works however you want it to work. That's one of the cool things. There are no rules like that on the gay side, we just do whatever we feel like doing in the moment.
also, more stupid questions: my crush (I'm in 8th grade by the way) is heavily rumored to also be gay, and when I came out to him and asked him to a school dance last September, he said: "he wasn't ready for a relationship yet". so I want to text him for valentines day, but I don't know if I should or not. I'm kind of oblivious to romance, and people have to be pretty blatant with me for me to get it, so help, please
Sure, I don't see any harm in texting him for valentines day. Even if he doesn't want a relationship it'll still make him feel good that someone cared enough to text him for it.
how does this sound (I'm open to constructive criticism, keep in mind I'm really oblivious) before you read it though here's some context: a.) we live within car distance, and b.) my parents are divorced and have split custody c.)he is a part of my north port (mom's house) life. "hey, i know that you said you weren't ready for a relationship, but valentines day is coming up and i'll be at my mom's this weekend so if you want to hang out just text me, and if you want it to be just as friends it can be."
I agree with Destin. It's been some time since September so maybe he's ready for a relationships, but maybe not. Even if he's not, people tend to like hearing that someone cares about them, so I say go for it.
that sounds great maybe put some sort of prompt like if there is a coffee shop, or hang out place which is a nice date place that isnt crowded in your area, because this shows more initiative and might make him more receptive to your idea.
i decided to add "maybe we could go see into the spider-verse at the mall on sunday" because we have a local mall with a movie theater where it's playing
yeah that sounds great, i heard its a great film, and the idea of a movie date just has the nice touch of being traditional and also a awesome splash of "eDgY" flare.
None of those are stupid questions at all. These are things we all have to learn how to figure out so keep on asking Like Destin said, best thing about being gay is that a LARGE portion of rules set by society are just gone. You get to live your life exactly how you want it to be. That's good because you get the freedom to do as you wish, and its bad because well its scary trying to figure out what exactly we want to do. Usually the person who knows the dance best will lead. Once both people know how to dance at the same level then people either have a preference or they will decide before they start dancing. "Want to lead this time?" "okay!" "Agh, I hate leading. Do you mind?" "Haha yeah that's fine" And that's it! Chilvary its a dumb custom that straight people created to treat women as the delicate flowers that they are. Its a bit insane of a system. Instead, all you have to do is treat your partner nicely and be considerate of their needs. You both should be doing this to each other instead of expecting only one person in the relationship to be the one taking care of everything. Who pays: Most couples will decide on a system that works for them. I have friends who split food and drinks, other friends take turns, and some pay it half and half. This is something that you have to ask your partner. Being cold: whoever is not cold can give up their jacket. If its too cold, instead of someone being cold just find something better to do and go inside Main trick it to talk to each other, figure out how each person wants to be taken care of, and then do that As for your crush I would suggest, instead of inviting him out on a date, send him a text message as a friend. Wish him a happy day. If he isn't ready for a relationship I doubt that has changed by now, but you can always start a great friendship meanwhile
