Lately I have been stressed and not really ok with my situation. I have a lot of university work and the old lady who rents me a room is pissing me off. In a month I am getting away from this apartment cause I can't anymore. She is suffocating me, she wants me to be happy and all smiley. She acts like I am her daughter or something and one time she came with me at my doctor, came into the room and started talking with the doctor ABOUT MY PROBLEM. I felt so uncomfortable and weird! Her behavior overall stresses me. I feel like I am a jerk with her because she is old BUT I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE. And she wants to get into my life and I don't want that. People make me uncomfortable at some point in life and I am stressed because of it. Ever since 2014 started I felt so stressed and I don't even know what to do about it. I feel like I am a jerk with her I act like a spoiled brat but I can't push myself to be happy and stop being angry all the time. I went home this weekend and everything was so great I played with my favorite cousin, I was with my family finally and I felt great. Lately I have been stressed, uncomfortable, and angry. I am angry and tired of internet of life of idk why. I broke up with my ex girlfriend a month ago she told me she was in love with her ex and I discovered she was nothing but straight and I was the exception. I like another girl and she doesn't give a shit. I just wanna be ok but I don't know why and I feel like going crazy. I can't hide myself in my bed forever I am really trying to get over this situation of mine but I don't know what to do. I am confused and under so much emotion. I am scared of leaving this room because I know I will meet people and I have to face them. I don't wanna be a jerk with them I don't wanna hurt people but right now people hurt me the most. I feel like a laptop with a low battery right now.
It will be only a month, right? Count down the days and don't let it upset you. But this anger... the people who are very angry are often suffering. It can be also a self-defense. It can be something that happened years ago, but you haven't gotten over it yet. And you feel lost and vulnerable and attack even before it is needed. Could it be something like that?
Well, when I was younger I was bullied. I used alcohol and self harm to get over my frustration and the verbal abuse in school. When I entered high school everything was alright. I was 15 back there and to be honest I was very aggressive with everybody including my family but now I am doing ok somehow. I am calmer and I try to work with my anger and ignore whatever makes me angry. But overall is still there and when I feel attacked I started cursing and getting pretty angry.
