Small Victories

I changed my profile photo on facebook to how I look recently. Yay for shirts!

 

My boobs are getting tricky to hide....

 

Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Both? If you're worried about someone finding out before you are ready to tell them, you could always get a binder? I know it's the reverse of what you want, but if you need to hide them around certain people, a binder might just be the way to go :O

 

A little bit of both. I'm moving to an environment soon where I won't have to hide, which is good. Sports bras are working well for now, and it's still cool enough I can get away with a hoodie most days, which helps(they aren't big or anything, just starting to be noticeable in a tshirt....

 

*High fives Casey!*

 

hey, there you are.... was getting worried about you sis.

so you're well on your way Brooke.

im getting tenderness around my the center of my boob areas, more on one side than the other. (not sure if that's normal or not)

anyway, happy to see you posting again, missed you.(*hug*)

 

Yeah--I've started feeling awkward when I don't wear a shirt.

 

On the other end of the spectrum I feel more comfortable not wearing a shirt lol. I was always able to get away with that though.. yay for being afab and having barely even darts for tits! lol
I'll leave now... but not before saying that I found out some interesting news that is.. bitter sweet:
I had a call back from a doctor only to discover I am intersex... In a sense.. My chromosomes are xxy instead of xx. Apparently some doctors disagree about this being intersex and just call it a hormonal imbalance, but I can fight for this since I have umm.. more private reasons with the considerations of my "downstairs" I have had for a few years now, but never bothered before to see what was going on until recently. Man, All I wanted was a smooth path in life.. O_O I am going to boot camp in a month.. and now of all times I find out I can be doing all this still and being labelled as possibly correcting a birth defect..:dead: This is now too much.. I am thinking about just not mentioning this or doing more about it until a little later on in the military path.

 

Darts? That's a new one Yeah, you wouldn't be the first trans person to later find out they're intersex (other than being trans, which some have said counts)... seems to be validating for a lot of folk.

 

lmao I get that word from my family's language. My siblings mainly would refer to small tits as darts xD
I was told and I find that pretty interesting. It's like, my body has been trying to tell me something forever :O I was told I was lucky since now I can get insurance for anything i want done in the future.. but I still feel cursed you know? :| Like, I was still labelled female and I still got to do the stuff and everything and I still experience dysphoria and emotional stress like anyone else who is trans feels or felt. Bitter sweet.. Things are always bitter sweet lately .__.

 

Vincent, oh my... Good luck with the bootcamp, tho.

 

My weight has been going down a good amount recently. At the doctor last week(when my estrogen dose was upped to twice a day) my weight was 10 lbs lighter than the visit 3 months ago. Just yesterday I weighed myself, with pj's instead of bluejeans that jad my 3ds and wallet and a leather pouch on the belt, I measured 7 lbs lighter. My guess is that maybe half of that might have been lost from just not wearing my shoes or leather pouch.

Still, to me, that is 17 lbs closer to my target feminine weight.

Also, it has been getting harder to move heavy loads, so I think my muscles are changing and getting less dense.

 

progress is a great feeling isnt it? one of the side effects, from our point of view, is the weight loss from the diuretic effects of spiro. between cutting out sugary pop and spiro i've got 15 gone since last fall. pop last fall and spiro in feb.

 

I already lost weight from drinking the low/no cal stuff almost exclusively, now is the muscle changes and stuff... haven't really noticed any real increase in restroom frequency, but that might just mean I haven't paid attention to it.

 

lol, i've become queen of the washroom, the 'throne' is mine...

 

I gained weight since starting hrt.....

 

that can happen too, my doctor warned me since im a bigger person anyway.

 

I almost set an appointment with a gender therapist.