Yesterday, I came out to another friend. Although surprised, as they all seem to be, she was very supportive. Most people are when I tell them because I am married to a man and living as a heterosexual by all apperences. Discovering my truth, that I am a lesbian, was a fairly long process for me. Like others, once I realized it there has been no going back. I find that life goes along smoothly and then I start to get anxious again about feeling like I’m hiding my truth from myself and from everyone else. Then I find comfort in a casual conversation where I tell a friend what I have considered “my secret” for so long. Each time it gets easier and it is no longer the focal point of the conversation or why we were talking in the first place, it’s unplanned and just feels right. I no longer fear that this news will be out to everyone before I am ready because that person may tell someone or feel a tiny sense of omg what did I just do, I shouldn’t have told them. When I started this journey I thought I would have to change my entire life at once and if I didn’t I wasn’t really gay and wouldn’t be accepted into the community and that was causing me a great deal of stress. I had a good friend tell me recently that everyone is different and it will take as long as it takes, don’t put a time frame on it. That is what seems to work for me. I find comfort in the slow process of coming out one person at a time, when I’m ready, and I grow stronger in my confidence in not only being a lesbian but being a person.
Hi @zumbaqueen, it's lovely to read a positive update from you. I glad you're getting supportive responses, and that you feel you're moving in the right direction, without any pressure to move any faster than you are comfortable with.
@zumbaqueen congrats on your success! I'm so glad that your friends are being supportive; it really means a lot and helps this process exponentially no doubt. As you are open with more and more people, it will keep getting easier until it's really no big deal at all. I'm at the point where telling someone new that I'm gay (by referring to a girlfriend for example), is not much different than talking about where I'm from, my pets, my family, etc. It's incredibly freeing to not worry about it any more - keep it up and you can get there too!
