Last week I came out to my friend dana, She took it pretty bad cause she "liked" me. well lately she has been flirting with me and trying to change me so she could know if we would ever work out. how do I get her to understand.
You have to just be blunt with her and say that you are ONLY interested in friendship and that she should quit making advances toward you.
Becky nailed it on the head, as usual. :icon_bigg Some girls will be convinced that they have some hidden power that can turn gay men straight again. Don't ask me why, but it's true. I actually dated one before I fully came out while I was in high school. After a five-year relationship that eventually fell apart because we wanted the same thing (men), she revealed that in some facet of her mind she thought that I might have been gay but that maybe she could "turn" me. She didn't mean it to be a cruel thing, though. It was her way of coping with her feelings for me. It was a form of denial. Your friend is probably feeling the same way right now. She doesn't want to see the end of her crush. We've seen enough threads on here about crushes to know how devastating they can be sometimes. She's going through that right now. Let her down gently, but don't make her think that it will work out with you. The sooner she knows this, the sooner she can get on with her own life.
I don't really have anything new to add, but I do have a gal friend who is convinced that being gay is a choice. She knows I'm gay, but there was a point where she had a crush on me, and really wanted me to change (she didn't talk about it a lot, but i know she was thinking that for a while). Why do they think that? Who knows. I know there are gay guys who think they can change straights (sorry, it ain't gonna happen unless they were a bit bi to begin with..), so it's probably that same mindset.
