Hello everyone When I was 6 I became romantically attracted to a girl. When I was 8 I became sexually attracted to girls and VERY, VERY attracted to them sexually. I really "over-masturbated" to them (porn is a bitch, I had to watch 5 scenes every day and... fap for 6 years) Then I somehow started having these gay fantasies about me topping another guy (this sounds funny LOL) and fapped and I orgasmed I feel that for the past 4 years, my sexually shifted from exclusively straight to mostly gay. This has been VEEEEERY confusing to me because I reckon my sexuality is VEEEEEEERY fluid. It's basically mostly gay (in terms of FANTASIES) but I WOULD NOT MIND fucking a hot girl like... right now (since I've never had sex with either sex) I know that as you read these lines, you're like LMFAAAAO at the paragraph above, but I'm sorry, this is how I've been feeling And I keep telling myself: I wanna be anything but gay (gay - PLEASE no!) Not that there's anything wrong with gay people - I LOVE THEM as PEOPLE (they are humans, I need to respect everyone)... but it's my own ideologies of life / about life stopping me from making out with guys, for real... So can anyone tell me if gay people have EVER felt this VERY VEEEEEERY intense physical attraction to members of the opposite sex? BTW it definitely wasn't porn making me soooo horny for girls because I was like that before I started masturbating to female-focused porn... Thank you very much to everyone that reads these lines and answers (possibly).
To be fair I do not think you are gay. Bi at best but maybe not even. You say that you fantasize about men, fantasies don't always reflect our sexuality. Are you attracted to guys in real life ?
Yep, Linning has the right of it. Fantasies are an indicator, but not the only one and not the best. Are you fantasies about people you've met, or made-up people? You should reflect on your attractions to "real" people. Have you ever been attracted to a guy? To a girl? Have you had crushes, and if so, on what gender(s)? Also, you should try to get over your fear of being gay. It will be much healthier for you. There is nothing wrong with being gay, and it shouldn't oppose your "ideologies." If you can't accept the possibility of you being gay, it will be much harder for you to figure out your true orientation, because you'll be rejecting one option right off the bat without even considering it.
I'm the same way. I always thought I liked women. Never attracted to men but liked gay porn... I think it could have something to do with getting bored of normal porn. Same old thing...