Sexual feelings

Apart from sexual things has anyone noticed any other effects of being able to be themselves, e.g being more confident, finding out more about what they want to do with their lives. I think I used up so much energy tring to be something that I wasnt that I forgot to think about who I actually was. I'm getting more interested in the history of the gay rights movement and being comfortable with some gay friends.

Also I'm less inclined to go out with my straight friends as I feel more comfrotable being around gay people. I can see this being a problem though as my straight friends will still want me to hang out with them.

Also I've gone off my job (im in the office now) I just want to be something different. More myself xxx

 

Self-confidence is a work-in-progress as I'm still building up my courage to throw open the door. But creativity, happiness and being able to feel again are just some of the things I've regained after accepting myself finally. That, and I find myself craving contact with like-minded friends (non-sexually; the innuendos are fun, but friends are first).

 

The notion of finding friends is really exciting to me after holding back for years. It's not like I want to sit around with people talking sex for hours on end, but it's really wonderful to think of not having to perpetually adjust comments in my head before speaking to avoid revealing too much. Just being able to make reference out loud to a guy on the TV being hot still gives me a nice happy feeling. Besides the nice happy feeling that the hot guy on the TV brings in the first place!

 

Thats what it is all about, just being able to say what you like without worrying what other people think all the time. Also having someone understand where you are coming from, I cant talk about fancying girls with my straight friends.

I think that is also the problem with my Mum, I can't talk about being gay in front of her because she doesn't know what to say back to me. It gets very uncomfortable whenever I talk about anything gay, even mentioning something like ellen page coming out as Mum doesn't know how to respond. With a gay group of friends it would be easier to discuss things like that.

 

Absolutely, Molly! I am more confident, more open to new experiences, to meeting new people, to exploringmyself. I feel more. And as to the bolded sentence above, that's the thing about hiding in the closet--about deception and self-denial. It does take so much energy. The filters that we keep in place for our words, our facial expressions, our emotions, need to be functioning every moment. And what exhausting, enervating work that is.

The only discomfort I still feel is when I'm around straight acquaintances/friends who don't know yet that I'm gay. I'm not in the closet anymore, but I haven't rented a billboard, either.

Thanks for asking the question! Is it worth a thread of its own, do you think?

/Ed.

 

Lost weight, entire new wardrobe, my first pair very expensive jeans (with button fly, adds sexiness!), haircut, multiple pairs of cool glasses, and grew a beard!

Here's the reality guys. Unless you're into being a bear type, there is no getting past going to the gym and watching what we eat. A lot. And dressing to look good.

It's great to buy sexy underwear, just got a bunch of Andrew Christian stuff, and believe me I'm no young trophy boy.

I just read that your coming out age is years out plus 15. I think I'm a little more advanced than that, but it's still an adolescence of sorts.

Have fun with it! Next time you need to wear a conservative business suit, pick a great colorful tie, and wear the brightest color underwear you've got!

And when you go on a date, maybe don't wear any underwear at all!?! <smirk>

 

Yes it is great to do things in older life. For my mid life crisis I became a Muslim that was before 9/11 best thing I ever did- but what I'm doing now is better- I am planning on living to over 100 so have a challenging mental attitude is what it is all about! Enjoy

 

OMG didn't put that together! That's a hoot.

 

Hey, even us bear types are trying, dropped 15# and going to the gym. Need to start shopping for myself, doesn't mean I don't want to try. Polo's out with their new cruise line and B squared and Orvis just opened. Pale lavander cashmere socks are calling as are new glasses...maybe two pair.(!)

 

Since coming out a year ago I’m super horny much of the time but now have spotty skin, and I think my beard growth has speeded up .. must be a new rush of teenage hormones. Would love to grow some ###### but my facial hair is light ginger in colour so it never really shows up but too self-conscious to use any form of beard dye .. any suggestions would be welcome.


As for underwear I have worn skin tight lycra boxer briefs for the last few years. Would love some of those Andrew Christian (OMG those car wash adverts) briefs with the large hole at the back, more like a jock strap I suppose, but I don't know how the wife would react. Trousers: gone for tighter designer brands and more adventurous colours. My wife even bought me a light weight summer scarf to make me look more trendy.

I also did the new glasses thing and have a nice pair of Oakley sunglasses and now use hair products, styling gel to be precise.

Also been thinking about doing something with my eyebrows but not decided what.

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