I have been dealing with depression for a long time now and I finally told my aunt (my guardian) that I am willing to seek professional help. My aunt and I had an agreement that as long as I talked to her I wouldn't have to see a professional (she has a bachelors degree in psychology). She found someone who specializes in teen depression and teen sexuality that she thinks I should see. I'm really nervous about it. Has anyone had a good experience with counseling? Is it as bad as it seems? Any reassuring words?
Seeing a counselor or a therapist can really be beneficial. I have been through 4 therapists so far, and overall it's been helpful. Just some things to keep in mind. - Make sure they're the right fit. Pay careful attention to the first impression you get from them. Do they listen to you with an unbiased perspective, do they listen, are they compassionate, are they what you look for in someone who comforts you? It's very important to find someone who is a good fit. The first one you see may not be right for you. One person doesn't reflect all therapists and you can keep looking around to find someone who suits your needs. - Try to be honest with them. Their job is to help you, and if they aren't, then say it. No hard feelings anywhere. This is for your health. If you feel you're stuck with them and they aren't helping anymore, tell them, and possibly switch therapists. Opening up to a complete stranger can be daunting, and one in many therapists can be very unsuitable. Just remember there are so many people out there in this field and they are all different. My first therapist was horrible. The others? They really helped me grow. I reached a halt point with them, and I switched over for many reasons. Therapy can really be beneficial to someone going through mental health issues, and talking to a complete stranger sometimes is easier than your own family. I have major and chronic depressive disorders, chronic since I was a child, and this is my thoughts on it. I think you should definitely give it a try and it could very much help you out. Good luck!
It has really helped me work through some issues, including me being bisexual. I've only seen one and still seer her, although less frequently than I used to. It can be very helpful. Good luck!
Keep in mind that therapists are just people. There are a lot of helpful, compassionate therapists out there, but also a lot of crappy, selfish ones. I've mostly had bad experiences, personally. But I hope you find a good one.
I've been seeing a psychologist every few months, though before I use to see her every week. She's been great, she's helped me develop coping strategies and allowed me to vent my problems. Make sure you find one that suits your needs. If you don't feel comfortable with the psychologist I'm the first couple of sessions, it might be time to look for another one. That's my advice, at the very least.
I've also seen a therapist when I was dealing with overcoming being raped and I have to say that after connecting with the right therapist that it helped me out a great deal. I would highly recommend it. Best wishes..JS
I have been seeing a therapist since February and my life has changed so much. If you give them time, therapists can change your life for the better. I cannot express enough how good therapists can be, good luck .
Hi there! Therapy is really helpful for many people(myself included). Fit is very important-if you aren't comfortable with the therapist, you probably won't get as much out of therapy as you could be getting. One thing that many people find helpful is coming up with a list of questions to ask and/or topics you might want to discuss. Let us know how it goes!
Seeking for help when we need it is always a good idea. Seeing a therapist will be helpful. As other people told you, you have to find the right one. Somebody who makes you feel confidence. Maybe you have to see several therapists before you find the one who fits you. That musn't be an obstacle for you. Once you've find the right one, open up and don't have fears or feel any shame. Keep in mind that a therapist is a professional whose job is helping people. I really encourage you to seek help. According to your post, I understand that you've realised that you want to change your life for the better. That's the right step. I've seen a lot of therapists and I go to a psychiatrist and it really has helped me. You will get much better.
I started seeing a counselor / therapist after coming out to my wife of 35 years. She suggested it, and I was pretty negative about the idea. I asked gay friends for recommendations, then narrowed the list to those who accepted my insurance. I went to the first one who had an opening. First couple of sessions I definitely kept my guard up, didn't say much, and was pretty resistant. But then I changed my attitude and it's been a good thing. Give it some time. A positive attitude helps.
Counseling is not "Commanding". A counselor's job is to listen to your story and help you find in yourself what you really want and what are the ways to achieve those goals. Now, not all counselors will be a good fit for your personality, but you also have to remember that they are people too with their opinions. The best ones know how to limit their biases and give objective advice.
Counseling is not "Commanding". A counselor's job is to listen to your story and help you find in yourself what you really want and what are the ways to achieve those goals. Now, not all counselors will be a good fit for your personality, but you also have to remember that they are people too with their opinions. The best ones know how to limit their biases and give objective advice.
Smores, I have been seeing a therapist for a long time and I think it's a great idea for any gay person who's dealing with depression. For a teen it's a great approach. I think of a therapist (or counselor) as an expert listener and trusted advisor. They listen to what's going on in my life, how I feel about my life, and what I want to accomplish with my life. From their professional experience they can help me identify ways that I may be getting in my own way, they may provide a second opinion about something important to me, or they may even identify areas of caution that I should be concerned about. A therapist may give me an objective opinion on something or a "reality check". They don't tell me what to do, they just listen to what I have to say and they give me their guidance to help me be mentally healthy, happy, and productive with my life. Although a therapist or counselor isn't your "friend" like a regular friend, it is important that you feel comfortable with them and that you trust them. Just like anyone, you "click" with someone or you don't. You should click with your therapist and feel at ease with them. Be choosy about your therapist or counselor. There are many out there, and some either don't specialize in LGBTQ topics or they don't support being LGBTQ, although this is fairly rare today. Find a therapist that specializes in LGBTQ issues or is even LGBTQ themself. You may also find that you talk more easily with a female or with a male. It's perfectly fine to prefer a therapist based on their gender. Also, your conversations with your therapist are confidential, unless you state a desire to harm yourself or others. These conversations are your own to feel comfortable to be yourself, talk about what you want to talk about, maybe even be angry, sad, or talk openly about your depression. Be as open as you can with your therapist, and they'll be able to help you more. I hope this helps! Please let us know how you're doing and if you find a therapist that's right for you. Remember that we're all here for you and care for you very much. Patrick
I'm not exactly sure what I can say to offer my support as you go through this, but know this: therapy will help. The effects won't begin appearing immediately, nor will they completely rid you of depression, self-doubt, etc. For therapy to work right, you really need to find the right person (or people, if support groups are something you're interested in). More than anything, I need to stress your need to talk to them! They won't be able to do anything if you refuse to open up. Remember, they want to help, and they won't judge you or think less of you because of your doubts. If, after a couple of sessions, they really aren't helping (or, god forbid, they are actually hindering your recovery) find someone else. There is someone out there who will be essential to your healing process, but it will take time. Personally, I've been seeing therapists as far back as I can remember, and only one has been truly helpful. Even if you don't really discuss anything with the actual therapist, just having someone you know well enough to, say, talk to them in your mind's eye/write down your problems as if you're talking to them might be extremely helpful. Know that your aunt (and the people on this website) will always be ready to talk when you need it. You are loved, and you will find the support you need!
Like LoveIsLove01 said, make sure it's the right fit and if it isn't, don't give up on therapists. Therapy is great with the right person. But in order to find the right fit, you have to commit to being as open as you can be. Just remember they are bound by ethical standards and you are not going to regret what you say because it's not going to come back and bite you. You might have a hard time disclosing but just make sure it's because you aren't ready. Not that you don't trust the process.
After seeing two marriage counselors and two therapists, here's my suggestions for you: 1 - Write down what you want to get out of counseling. What are your goals? Not being depressed? Being more social? Being more comfortable with your sexuality? Whatever YOU want out of therapy, write them down. 2 - Write out a time line as to when you want to see progress. Finish in one year? Certain goals met at certain points in your therapy? Whatever they are, write them down. 3 - When you initially meet with your therapist, share the lists with them. Be prepared to make adjustments. They may know that one issue could be solved in two appointments while others could take years. Be flexible but insist on coming up with a list of goals and time lines you both agree on. 4 - Start therapy. Be open and honest about everything. No hiding facts, no lies. You want help? You have to commit fully. 5 - Every few sessions look at your lists. Are you on target? Why or why not? Address these with your therapist. One marriage counselor and one therapist looked at my as billable hours... the more sessions I went, the more they got paid. When I used the above method I held both my therapist and myself accountable for fixing my issues.
I had a terrible experience with a therapist. They are not all bad though so.. My advice based on my personal mistake: USE YOUR JUDGEMENT Dont trust the person just because they have a title. If you are not comfortable to express your true feelings or feel judged or disliked or a lack of empathy.... Find somebody else. Don't feel guilty just leave. Make it your choice. good luck
A really good therapist is similar to a supportive, empathic, nonjudgmental friend. This is someone you can open up to, talk to about stuff you woudn't share with anyone else, and all they do is present options that perhaps you hadn't considered... different ways to look at things, different strategies that have been helpful for others. Everything is in your control. And if you don't agree with your therapist's interpretation of something... that's fine. Let him or her know. And s/he won't judge you for it. It's one of the most useful experiences someone can have, and, for depression, it can be life changing.
Hi Smores! I am glad you ask this important question! I am a therapist and I work with people as they are coming out. Working with a good therapist can be such a great idea if you can trust them and connect with them. One of the best pieces of advice I can offer is to interview your therapist. Just because someone can give you an appointment, doesn't mean they are the best therapist FOR YOU. Ask them about their style. Are they really direct? Do they just sit there and ask you how you feel? What approach would work best for you? Also them about confidentiality and their experience with coming out. Think about the things that would be important to you...and ask those questions! Remember that therapy works best when you have a great match to a talented therapist! This is your time to work on your future!
