My question is, I’ve always emotionally connected with my best friends (one at a time). There wasn’t anything sexual about it, they were pretty but not like “oh my gosh she’s so pretty, I have to talk to her”. More like “she’s pretty, I’ll be friends with her and she seems like she would fit into a friend group I would want to be in”. Once They got into a relationship I was never jealous, I would just hop to the next friend to emotionally attach to. mince I got into a relationship with my ex within the first few months, I got butterflies for a women once. I couldn’t tell you what she looked like or if I past her on the road, I would t know it’s her, we made eye to eye contact and I got butterflies from it and ran away because I didn’t understand what just happened. Then when my boyfriend cheated on me, I kept naturally staring at a lesbian in the gym, we made eye contact and I again got butterflies. I see more women than men naturally. I would say I find a lot more women pretty than I do find guys cute/hot. It seems like I’m Bisexual or possibly even a lesbian once I try to hook up with a girl. My issue is when I look for a girl to try my sexuality out with, I don’t think of them as “hot” I just think they’re pretty like any other girl, any ideas on what to do?
I wouldn’t try to force anything as it could lead to some stress. It could be that you have a certain type, or are one of those people who don’t experience attraction that often? Not every bi woman or lesbian gets butterflies from every pretty woman they see. I rarely feel butterflies or get crushes — however when I do, there’s no doubt in my mind that I’m attracted to them. If you are comfortable with experimenting with a woman you just find pretty as opposed to having more intense feelings, there’s nothing wrong with that (if both parties are consenting to it of course). Provided you’re safe and happy that’s all that really matters. And it may even ignite something. That being said, you don’t have to experiment at all if you’re unsure. It can sometimes be better to allow natural attraction to take place and let your heart tell you what kinds of people you like, if that makes sense. Instead of trying straight away to force something deeper from physical actions. But I’m not exactly the most experienced person, so others may be able to give better/more informed advice!
What about imagining being with a girl, can you imagine being with a girl? It doesnt have to be the first place your mind goes when you see a pretty girl in order for you to have same sex attraction. For me I always felt like a wanted a best (female) friend. I never thought about my friends in a sexual way or imagined kissing them but eventually I did figure out I was gay. Now I am not saying that is definitely what is happening with you but perhaps let your mind wander and see where it takes you.
