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question for women who want to be men

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by AfraidandAlone, Mar 29, 2015.

  1. AfraidandAlone

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    i know when i look in the mirror and see this big guy staring back at me it makes me want to cry and i cant help but think how ugly i am. when ever some one calls me handsome or any thing like that all i can think is how much i would rather be called pretty, cute or any thing feminine. if i see a a female in something cute i get very jealous of them. what is the hardest thing for you guys?
     
  2. NingyoBroken

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    I want to warn you, this thread is triggering. Trans guys usually do not see themselves as women. Because they aren't "women who want to be men". They are men born with the wrong parts.
     
  3. AfraidandAlone

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    yea i knew as i was typing that it was wrong. i didnt intend to offend or hurt any one or start any sort of fight. i guess it is more the fact i still have a hard time admitting that same fact to my self that i am not a man who wants to be a woman but instead a woman trapped in a mans body i guess.
     
  4. Outlier

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    It's the same just in reverse. I was having a really bad day of that yesterday. I hate that no matter how I dress or cut my hair, my face is just too feminine and could never mistaken for a man's face. (the gigantic boobs that can't really be hidden at all don't help either). I just want to look in the mirror and actually see ME, and I want other people to see me too. I feel so invisible.
     
  5. Daydreamer1

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    It's not that I "want to be a man". I've always been one, I'm just a case of "some assembly required". The hardest thing for me right now is lower dysphoria, and how nothing I try makes it go away. I've described it as feeling incomplete and not whole, even when I pack. It's not doing the things I should be able to do if I was a cis male. It's stressful sometimes, especially now that we're in a day and age where trans people can be jailed for using a restroom. I haven't had bad run ins yet, but it's always a fear in my mind that someone will see me and kick my ass.
     
  6. Folieadeux

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    Yeah, the title isn't worded very well. :^I

    But, I guess it is the same in reverse. I hate how small my waist is and how big my hips are, I hate how no matter what, my neck is thin and lacks a large adam's apple, I don't like the shape of my legs, or how hard it is for me to gain muscle, I don't have a binder yet and it's really hard for me to cover up my chest to make me comfortable enough, and my voice is never deep enough, and the list goes on and on.

    I have to deal with the fear daily of never getting on testosterone, and it gets really hard some days.

    Sorry if this was really depressing, but we can overcome it!
     
  7. Michael

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    Too late, he triggered my confusion... I went like Huh? What is he talking about? Why would a woman want to be a man? :roflmao:

    You seem to be refering to transmen... Well, as others mentioned there was no real woman there on the first place, that's all the mistery... Same as with you, I don't think we should use the word "man".

    Defining yourself as a "x wanting to be an y" is not healthy... And not true anyways.

    There is a common problem for both transmen (or simply men) and transwomen (or simply women) : To transition is hard. In some countries almost impossible. Also to change your name, keep your job, be understood by lovers, family and friends... Those things are all but easy.

    The rest is hard as well, but not as hard as what I mentioned.

    Please, try to be more careful next time with words, it's free... As Ningyo mentioned, this is triggering for some folks. Not everyone here is at the same stage of transitioning,and will react like me.
    You risk hurting others, and that is the last thing we need here on EC.
     
  8. AfraidandAlone

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    thanks for all the replies and again im very sorry for the bad choice of words the last thing i ever want to do is hurt or offend. especially when every one has been so accepting of me. i figured it would be the same in reverse guess i just wanted to know for sure. i am really sorry if i offended any of you guys (or any girls in the same boat)
     
  9. Queero

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    Well, I'm not a woman, never have been, never will be.

    But I know what you meant, and I don't think you did it on purpose.

    Just to let you know, and I'm really not pissed, in the future, say something like "transguys", "ftms" or "trans men".


    I hate it when I see how most men's shirts lie on their bodies, and then realize for the billionth time that mine doesn't lie the same way. How my voice isn't quite right most of the time, how my hips look when I wear women's jeans.

    Whenever someone tells me I'm a "nice girl", or says I'll be a good "mother" or tells me "the girl's bathroom is that way" and I want to cry (which makes it even worse, not because I think men should never cry, but because if anyone sees me, they will think it's a teenage girl crying, which makes me angry. Vicious cycle).
     
  10. clockworkfox

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    One word: voice.

    I have the squeakiest, girliest voice, and there's not a hell of a lot I can do to change that. It gets pretty rough when I'm doing my best to be perceived as male, but when I open my mouth to say anything at all, I sound like this:

    [​IMG]

    After my voice, my hips are my next worst feature.
     
  11. Bastian

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    The hardest thing for me is simply not having male features. I´m quite happy with "being cute", because I aspire to be the cutest gay ever. What I hate is not being able to f--k someone properly, ´cause I don´t have the right "equipment" attached.
    But this is only for now. Things are changing, you know. I remember having quite hard times ´cause of my breasts, but I managed to ignore them somehow.
    I really think the time has come for me to pay a visit to specialist.
     
  12. anonym

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    The title had me confused too.
     
  13. Queero

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    Can I be the second cutest gay?
     
  14. Bastian

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    Deal!:grin:
     
  15. Michael

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    That was epic, just epic...
     
  16. Queero

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    Yeah! (!)
     
  17. AfraidandAlone

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    today for the first time ever i think, i looked in the mirror and wasnt upset by what i saw looking back. even with my beard (makes it easier to hide who i am) and well saw the real me looking back. it made me feel so amazing.
     
  18. GayJay

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    Height.

    I know that sounds kind of trivial but all my physicality's I can change. I can gain muscle and can progress a medical transition but I cannot grow taller.
    I know a lot of transguys would like to be 5'8 like me, but I don't know if anyone watches how I met your mother but my family are the Erriksons!

    All really tall, very built and very competitive. My brother turned 15 last week and is already 6'2 and the next youngest is 8yo and 5'2.
    There's a big emphasis on height and how being big makes you a man ect.. I know this is just ignorance but I am forever going to feel like the runt of the family.
     
  19. Outlier

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    That's great! :beer: Cheers to good days!!!!
     
  20. Queero

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    I know how being short feels. I'll be short no matter what. I'm 5'3".

    I will forever be short, y'know, 5'8" may be shorter than your family, but it's not REALLY that short. And being short does have advantages.

    You can cream the rest of you family at limbo. (sorry, that was lame) Short people are awesome.