Potential Roommate Issues

My suggestion is that you use the normal ways people go about finding strangers as roommates (whether that be newspapers, craigslist, or whatever), and just be sure to interview the person first before you let them sign. Just tell them right off the bat, "I'm gay. If that's going to be an issue, you shouldn't continue any further". The interview helps you know if you'll be able to chat with them as well, rather than having a silent roommate.

They don't need to be activists or anything, they really just need to not have a problem with it.

 

^ pretty much that, do the add or whatever and have them come in for an interview where you just let them know the regular things
"the rent is___, You'd have to clean up after yourself," etc etc and also say "Also i am gay so if that is an issue you probably shouldn't pursue any further. If it is not and you have any questions in relation to it just ask" do it with a smile and see what you get

This is gonna have to be a situation where you have to be active and let people know to get all things cleared up before they decide they want to move in and before you decide to room with them imo
srry for broken english xD

 

I don't know how you're going about advertising, but I've seen flyers on campus that say things like, "Roommate wanted! All religions/sexual orientations/gender expressions welcome! Must be OK with cats."

That method doesn't right out say "I'm a huge homo, btw", but it does at least imply to any prejudiced folks that they won't find likeminded people there. And whatever housemate you end up with shouldn't be completely surprised when you come out to them.

Also, any LGBT person looking for a place to stay might see it and go, "Hey! Someone who won't beat me with sticks! Awesome!" So you might end up with a housemate with something in common! =D

 

If you do place an ad, you could mention something similar to what others have said, such as "homophobes need not apply".

When I go looking for a roommate, I might say something such as "M or F, must have some sense of cleanliness, must support GLBT rights, age range 22-25, professionals move to front of the line" (I don't want any random GLBT person, I want them to be around my age, have a career-preferrably some sort of college degree too-, and they need to not turn my apartment into a trash heap)

 

I'll move in (if I get a job in the city you're in), that way you won't need to worry about coming out because it'll be no big deal to me.

But that would go against EC rules by doing that so...

 

^Thats against EC rules???

And i think you should just mention it during an interview. Be casual when you mention it and dont make a big deal about it.

 

Yea I rekon x2 is right. Just make a subtle drop if you don't like the labels. But to be honest, if it is an issue, and it concerns you, I reckon it should be dealt with. Circumventing is not a bad thing, as long as you get the job done, in my opinion, but I'm more of a, "F&#k it, I'll do it." sort of guy. Good luck in the roomie hunt Bra.

 

As far as the label is concerned, I've found that an easy way to talk about the whole LGBTQAXYZ and whatever letters they've added on nowadays is just to say "not completely straight."

So if you mention to them, "Hey, by the way, I'm not completely straight, just so ya know," I think it gets the right message across.

 

Well it would be against EC rules to message Chandra to meet up, or send emails to each other.

But Chandra, honestly, if you are running the show, then you are running the show. If they don't like it, then they can get the hell out-move, and find another place.

I would treat this situation as a "matter of fact" case. I was worried about this too with my landlady but figured I'd do the "I'll act as if she knows and it's no big deal"(which it isn't because it's not like my gf and I do drugs or other illegal things in the house.) So I asked if I could bring 'my friend home' (yes I did cringe to pull that phrase out of the closet), for the first few times that she visited. After that, I simply pick her up at her place, we come to my place, have dinner, watch movies, play video games etc. It's just a 'oh hey, how's it going', whenever she sees her now. So she can think what she wants. (Although I'm pretty sure she knows I'm gay -or that I really like the rainbow, by looking at my rainbow flag and bracelet I sometimes wear. :lol. If she ever does ask outright then I will be honest because she knows I'm a kind person and good tennant.

 

I don't know how out you are with your sexuality, but I think you'll find that the more people who know, the easier it will be to say you aren't straight when meeting someone. My fraternity just got 8 new pledges I have to inform, so I just do it nowadays, to release the awkwardness that might follow.

Basically, "I'm about as straight as a rainbow, so go ahead and make fun of me for it. If I'm offended, I'll tell you. I'll certainly find something to make fun of you for, so go for it." or even "Fair warning, you'll probably see me making out with a dude, so don't be surprised."

It's not a huge deal in my life anymore with so many people already knowing, so it isn't hard to tell people if I find a need

I don't know if that was helpful or related to the topic at all, but I tried!

 

Ha. I love those ideas Zumbro. That made my day.

 

I kind of feel that with potential roommates, you should be direct. Make sure you let them know, rather than just assessing their views on gay rights, or something. Someone could be fine with gay couples marrying, might even have some gay friends, but be uncomfortable with a gay roommate. Of course, in these modern times, everyone should be cool with it, but it'd be worse for you if a few months down the line you realized they felt uncomfortable and eventually moved out.

It's not a big deal, but it's not an insignificant part of your life. People living together should know a bit about each other, like smoking habits, when they like to get up, and stuff. "Not really straight" is probably the best way of putting it. Queer suggests a particular sort of gay activism. And I know what you mean, even though loads of people know now, I'd rather be able to tell people something like, "I'm meeting my boyfriend later" than finding a way of working my sexuality into the conversation.

If it's a friend of a friend, and if you have reasonably modern, progressive friends, it really shouldn't be an issue. I'm just thinking back now to a party I was at last weekend in a friend's house. She's sharing a house with a girl who was in her class, but they only really got to know each other after they graduated and needed to share rooms. My friend is, like yourself, not straight, she's had boyfriends and girlfriends in recent times. It never occurred to me that she would have had to bring that up, but she presumably did mention it at the start, and that it just wasn't an issue at all.

 

That's GREAT! So good to hear things worked out for you Chandra! Good luck with the move!

 

I'll move in with you