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My womanizing brother just announced he's gay by text?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by slickrick, Aug 31, 2016.

  1. slickrick

    slickrick Guest

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    My distraught mother woke me this morning to tell me that she'd received a message from my younger brother (26) telling her he broke up with his new girlfriend because he's gay. And he likes, I quote, "things up his bum".

    Yes, the language sounds like a wind-up text but his (now ex) girlfriend confirmed the story. My whole family, including myself, is very confused.

    I know my brother and am close to him, and this is so out of character. He does a lot of drugs and sometimes has episodes close to what might be called psychosis.He's never seemed to show any interest in men and has only ever had relationships with women, talked of his interest in girls.

    I'm tempted to think that the drugs might be to blame, but possibly not.

    Can any guys here relate to this? Could the womanizing have been a cover up all along, or might he simply be questioning/exploring his sexuality? My parents were very intolerant to my own orientation until recently, perhaps he kept it hidden because he was afraid of the same reaction?

    We're having trouble contacting him at the moment so I haven't had a chance to chat to him yet. How do I proceed here when this is so out of character? :eusa_doh:

    Thanks
     
    #1 slickrick, Aug 31, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2016
  2. Anthemic

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    There are many possibilities here. He could be straight and think he's gay because he likes things "up his bum"; and he might be confused since he likes it. He could also have been using his "womanizing" as a cover-up. He could also be confused because of drug use. It's hard to say just by what you've said. Once you get in contact with him, tell us what happens. I don't know enough about this situation to say for sure.
     
  3. slickrick

    slickrick Guest

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    That's what my mum told him.... just cause you like things up your bum doesn't mean you're gay! Lol. No response. Will update x
     
  4. Guff

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    "I like things up my bum" What an awesome coming out quote...


    I dunno what to say, other than I hope things clear up for you (and your family) quickly! Uncertainty can be maddening at times. I'm hopeful you'll get your answers soon.
     
  5. sartorious

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    I really dont know what to respond but in my opinion, figuring out your sexuality needs crystal clear consciousness. And since you said that there might be drug, his way of thinking may be altered.

    have you try to get the drug thing out of equation?

    sticking things up in his bum doesn't always mean that the person is gay. Being gay men (kinsey 6) is having emotional, romantic and sexual attraction exclusively towards other men. IMO personally if you like things up in your bum but only attracted exclusively to girls then you are not gay, you're someone straight with certain preference for types of sexual activity
     
  6. Anthemic

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    I'll be honest, I'm a woman and I recently experienced things partly up my bum (not all the way in) from an ex-lover. It actually felt pretty good. And I'm a lesbian, lmao. :icon_redf
     
    #6 Anthemic, Aug 31, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2016
  7. Quantumreality

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    Echoing sartorious, liking things up his bum doesn't equal homosexual. I know straight guys that like to have things stuck up their bum (a woman's stiletto heel comes to mind, as a specific example) while having sex with their girlfriend or wife.:slight_smile:
     
  8. JonSomebody

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    I can tell you that although your brother had given everyone the perception that he was straight by being a womanizer as you've mentioned but as far as what he really feels...no one knows this but him. I knew a guy who was also very popular with the women in my old neighborhood and like you and your family with your brother, the last thing that ever crossed my mind was if there's a possibility that he might be gay/down low. I happened to find this out first hand which literally caught me totally by surprise. To make a long story short, I would up having a secret affair with this guy for a whole Summer and he was very well experienced than I would ever imagined which helped me come to the conclusion that he has been sexually involved with quite a few guys prior to me. I mean, his sexual performance with me just blew my mind because I would have never guessed he had such sexual chemistry with men. Furthermore, the affair had gotten so intense that in the beginning, his was receiving non-stop phone calls, texts and messages from women and it had gotten to the point where he had stopped going out with them on dates or even spending time with them in order to give me his undivided attention. While in the presence of his family and friends, he was very masculine acting which gave no signals that he may be attracted to guys. In other words, there was nothing about him that would make you sense that he had a thing for men at all. It was not until towards the end of the Summer when a couple of his friends approached me about his sexuality because they had caught him staring at me several times without me knowing in a way that a guy would look at a woman when they are falling in love and they also told me that he began to talk about me a lot more than usual when I was not around. I guess what I'm saying to you is that the reason you may assume he might think he's gay does not make it a fact. I believe its so much more that he has been struggling back and forth with for some time and just came to the conclusion that he was ready to embrace it because the reason that you've stated is not a good reason to breakup his relationship with his girlfriend and put a stop to his womanizing ways. Just saying...
     
  9. slickrick

    slickrick Guest

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    Ok so my bro is currently in the psychiatric unit as he can also hear the voice of the devil and claims the "illuminati have got him". Starting to think he's probably not gay but psychotic.... Maybe both but... We'll see :frowning2:
     
  10. Anthemic

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    It definitely sounds like his drug use has gotten the best of him. Do you know what kind of drugs he's been using?
     
  11. JonSomebody

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    Okay..then that piece of information puts another perspective on everything as well as what I've mentioned in my response. Wish him well...JS
     
  12. HappyGirlLucky

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    I am sorry about your brother! Hope he recovers soon. (*hug*)
     
  13. slickrick

    slickrick Guest

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    Thanks guys for your good wishes, he's getting better and under the right care xxx
     
  14. JonSomebody

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    That is great news...wish him well...JS:thumbsup: