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monster

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by EddyG, May 23, 2013.

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  1. drs

    drs
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    Location:
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    Sexual Orientation:
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    EddyG, I feel much the same way... I wouldn't have called it "moral monster", but that's as good of term as any. I've pretty much accepted the fact that I'm gay. I'm not ashamed of that. I do feel shame in the fact that it's taken me so long to be able to admit it first to myself, then even longer to my wife. I feel shame in the fact that I've been unfaithful. I feel shame in the face that I have both a wife and a male lover who both care about me very much; who both deserve 100% of my love in return and aren't getting it.
     
    #21 drs, May 26, 2013
  2. EddyG

    EddyG
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    I actually feel shame only over the fact that I didn't come out earlier, much earlier. In retrospect that is the only thing I'd do differently; everything else I've done has been for the purpose of being able to remain in the closet. And if I'd come out earlier, none of the other things would have happened.

    I feel sad that my wife is paying such a huge price for my fear of coming out earlier. I'm not sure if I feel "guilty" though I do feel responsible.
     
    #22 EddyG, May 27, 2013
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