One of my main concerns in coming out on a larger scale to the point when everyone knows is people mistaking my kindness for interest. I'm a "shirt off my back" kind of guy. I'll go above and beyond for strangers, even. One friend that I do a lot of one on one with and I had a conversation with recently told me that he tells other people that I'm super nice. It's people like him that I'm worried about my friendship with. He's even a little on the flirty side. Does anyone else have/had this problem? How did you deal with it?
My problem is people mistaking my kindness for weakness & then getting shit on, only sad people will think you are coming onto them, don't let it change your personality, I don't let the people who have taken advantage of my good nature, stop me from helping people in need & if someone thought that my helping them was coming on to them, then they just need to get over themselves
I've never had people take advantage of me. I'm pretty firm in my character. I won't help anyone who wouldn't help me or help their self and I don't have a problem saying no. I have faith in people for the most part and most redeem that faith. And of course, you can't let a few bad ones spoil the bunch. My concern is my kindness being mistook for being interested.
Yeah, I'm nice to literally just about every person I meet, and because I'm so shy and barely talk, I can honestly say that nice people get taken advantage of. A lot. Just don't let people take advantage of you and if you're worried about people mistaking your kindness as you coming on to them, just make it clear that you're just nice and it only seems like you're interested.
Fair enough. Has anyone had this problem? Has anyone ever had someone mistake their kindness for being interested?
Actually, yes. When I first met my ex that's what happened. However it did turn out that down the road I developed an attraction to her. We've had an awkward kind of relationship. It's not that bad though. Things are a little awkward at first, but then things go back to normal after a while. You just have to make it clear that you aren't interested.