Looking

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by Curious bill, Jun 1, 2024.

  1. Curious bill

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    I have been married to my wife for over 30 years. We used to have a very good sex life but unfortunately my wife isn’t that interested in sex that much anymore.
    I have always been curious since I was a boy but never acted on it. But now I have become very curious. I did one time stop at a ABS … A little sketchy and dirty…didn’t feel to safe so decided not to go there anymore. I would love to find someone in my situation to meet once in a while but being married makes it a little hard.
    Anybody in my situation? And if so…what have you done about it.
     
  2. quebec

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    Curious bill…..Hello and a big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! :old_smile: I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent! :old_wink: ) when that becomes necessary! This is a safe community of loving, caring and very supportive people and we will do our best to help you blend into the community.

    *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out, join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. When I first joined Empty Closets I was in need of a lot of support and encouragement and I found it here…EC is a safe place. I hope that you'll find good things here too! Folks here will talk to you and share...you don't have to be afraid of asking questions...we're glad to have you! Empty Closets is all about making connections and giving LGBTQ folks a voice when they otherwise don't have one in their day-to-day lives. :old_cool:



    Some info on how to navigate EC: :old_confused:

    When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something”. When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. Only A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) and then only to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum:

    *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership.

    *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! :old_big_grin: If you have any questions at all, you can send me a Private Message as you can always send a staff member a Private Message.

    …..David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  3. Jakebusman

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    Hi welcome to EC I am Bi and married if that helps
     
  4. thefairmind

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    Welcom here. Nice to hear from you. I m bi and married. I'd love to exchange our sexual feelings and experience
     
  5. Jayo

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    Hi welcome to the group. I’m married and bi . I’ve been married for 20 years and live my wife but I also am bisexual. I have been faithful my entire relationship with my wife but I did experiment with my friend who I grew up with and that started when I was around 15 . If there is anything I can do to help let me know!
     
  6. thefairmind

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    Scholarly explanations of the strength and importance of LGBTQ+ individuals in society often highlight several key points:
    That's great!! We both share a similar experience! I'd like to ask you few questions to learn more from your experiences and perspectives:

    1. How did you come to understand and accept your bisexuality?
    2. How have you navigated being bisexual within the context of your marriage?
    3. Have you shared your bisexuality with your wife, and if so, how did that conversation go?
    4. Do you have any advice for someone who might be struggling with their bisexual identity?
    5. What has been the most challenging part of being bisexual and married?
    Thanks!
     
  7. Jayo

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    For question one I didn’t start to accept it until I was around 38 , a couple years ago. Began to acknowledge my feelings when I started to have some really vivid sex dreams that would get me super aroused before this happened I thought I just experimented because I was curious but this made me realize that it’s more than that. Number two I navigate being married by pleasing myself with toys when I feel the need. And also coming here helps to find others like me. Number 3 no I haven’t told her I don’t think she would accept this part of me.number 4 i guess I don’t really know what advice to give someone struggling with being bi since I’m still somewhat struggling myself. But i guess I would say your not alone this is something that obviously happens in nature I didn’t ask for this but here i am . Take it one day at a time nothing is wrong with me , you , us .number 5 I think the hardest part is trying to understand why I love my wife so much and am sexually attracted to her and lots of beautiful women but I also have gay fantasies that get me really excited lol . After my first sexual experience with a guy it’s crazy I was able to convince myself I was straight. The brain is very powerful at compartmentalizating things we don’t want to acknowledge or remember
     
  8. BlueCollarDude

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    Hey Bill. I know exactly how you feel and am in your shoes although I did experiment orally once with a guy. It’s not easy getting away to play but never impossible. I’m looking for someone as well. So many I’ve talked to online are full of shit or just weirdos. I know there’s a normal decent looking bi guy out there somewhere. Safety first, Pleasure second.
     
  9. Trinspar

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    100% agree. There are plenty of odd (or even dangerous) people online but beyond the external risk factors, there's you--are you prepared to ring a bell that can't be un-rung?
     
  10. BlueCollarDude

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    I am. I have been for years. As I’ve stated, I did give and receive oral to and from a man and have no regrets in doing so. As for anal, I’ve been into pegging and solo dildo play for many years. I’ve wanted for years and still want to experience the real thing. It just has to be attached to a decent, disease free and good looking guy, lol.
     
  11. Trinspar

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    Since you mention pegging, does your wife know about your desires?
     
  12. BlueCollarDude

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    My wife knows of and is ok with my love of anal play. She knows I’ve played with a guy before I met her and has no problem with it. As for my current desire, no. Although she should definitely by now suspect as I’ve hinted as has she playfully. She once said she dreamed that I went to meet a man for sex and smiled. We’ve discussed our similar porn likes. We both enjoy gay and bi porn. She says she really likes watching men give and receive anal. I haven’t flat out told her that I sometimes have the urge or craving to have sex with a guy but I’m pretty sure she knows. We just don’t walk about it. If she ever asks me I’ll tell her. I’m pretty sure she’ll be cool with it. I’m not actively looking for a hook up right now anyway. If I’m scorched and propositioned then maybe.
     
  13. Right Field 6

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    You describe my life almost perfectly. You sharing this means I am not alone and in good company!!!
     
  14. BlueCollarDude

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    Welcome to the club!
     
  15. JJ32060

    JJ32060 Guest

    Hello Bill, married 32 years and my wife also stopped the sex life about 5 years ago after menopause. I also have been curious as a boy but ignored it all my life. I did have some experiences but that was over 45 years ago. I joined some gay sites and came close to meeting to satisfy these intense urges but always chickened out due to worrying about social diseases and the guilt of cheating. So I’m basically stuck in this mode for now whereas I’m looking at naked gay men my age, porn, and only fantasizing about it. I’m not attracted to men but attracted to their penis if that makes any sense, thanks for sharing your post